Page 28 of Gift of You
My stomach rumbled, reminding me that we’d skipped lunch. With great effort, I rolled off him, stood, and held out my hand. “Come on. Let’s get cleaned up, and we can eat a late lunch.”
19
LOUIS
December 28
Bundledin my peacoat and scarf, I hustled down the sidewalk, wishing I hadn’t left my beanie in the city. The amount of heat I was losing from my bald head couldn’t be healthy in this weather. Thankfully, I wasn’t going very far.
I pulled open the door to the bakery, smiling as the warm scent of sugar and vanilla welcomed me into the shop.
“Louis!” Mrs. Sampson exclaimed like I was her long-lost best friend. “You’re back!”
It was mid-morning, late enough that it was past the morning rush but too early for lunch, making me the only customer in the shop. I crossed over to the counter, smiling in greeting. “Good morning, Mrs. Sampson. Did you have a good Christmas?”
“Please, call me Laurie. And yes, we had a lovely day. The kids made a mess of their gifts and we all ate ourselves silly. What about you?”
“I had a lovely phone call with my family, made myself dinner, then watched the Chiefs win. It was a good day.” I opted to leave Matthew out of it, trying to maintain his privacy.
“That’s good. I’m so glad to hear it. Now, what can I get you? I’m out of apple streusel muffins, but I’ve got banana and blueberry. I’ve also got pie by the slice—apple, pumpkin, and cherry. But if you really want to hit Matthew right in the sweet tooth, he’s got a thing for chocolate chip cookies.”
So much for leaving Matthew out of it. I started to ask her how she knew I was shopping for him, then decided it might be best not to open up that can of worms. I ordered a half dozen cookies, which she warmed up for me, then she made me a latte with brown-sugar syrup and extra whip, and a coffee for Matthew that she insisted was made to his preference. Thanking her, I stepped back out into the cold and headed down the block toward the bookstore with quick steps and my head down to combat the wind.
Matthew and I hadn’t spoken since yesterday afternoon, so I wasn’t sure what I’d find when I walked into the shop. After our nap and subsequent activities, Matty had made us sandwiches for a late lunch, then I’d excused myself to head back next door. He hadn’t put up much of an argument, saying he needed to spend time working on his audiobook prep anyway, and though it had stung, I’d tried not to take it personally.
For all he said that he was making progress in accepting this new side of himself, I had to imagine some space might be welcome. And if I was being honest, I had some thinking to do myself.
The way things had progressed, not just in terms of speed but also intensity, was... well, it was a lot. More than anything, I wanted to help him come to terms with all of this in a way that left him feeling good about it. I wanted him to see his bisexuality as a gift rather than a burden.
But even as I did my best to make all of this about him—moving athispace, meetinghisneeds, makinghimfeel good—I was becoming entangled. He had this way of making me feel likehe actually saw past my bullshit. And even still, he hadn’t pushed me away. In fact, he’d pulled me closer.
It was terrifying, because it felt good. More than good—it feltright. Natalie would probably roll her eyes at this line of thinking. How often had I fallen for someone so soon after meeting them, sure that this time would be different? This time the guy would stick around. This time he’d find me interesting, rather than just a good fuck. This time he wouldn’t tell me I wastoo much. Too needy. Too clingy. Too intense.
Except this time it reallydidfeel different. And I was only here for a few more days. A smart man would walk away now. Would make up an excuse to head back to the city early. Would take a few days to wallow about it, maybe even do a little bit of pining, then let it go. And I wasn’t a stupid man, but I’d certainly never been smart when it came to love.
Shoving those thoughts down and pasting a smile on my face, I pushed open the door to the bookstore. Ernie jumped off his chair with a shortmewand stalked toward me, the tip of his tail swishing as he went. He wound his body between my legs, bumping my shin with his head, letting out anothermewwhen I didn’t immediately bend down and pet him.
I set the coffees and cookies down on the counter and stooped to pick him up. He chirped then hoisted himself up over my shoulder and began purring as he kneaded my shoulders with his paws.
“Traitor,” Matthew grumbled as he approached from the back corner of the store.
“I don’t know what to tell you. Cats love me.”
Matthew gave the cat a scratch, then stood back, shifting his feet awkwardly.
“I brought you a treat.” I nodded to the items I’d set down on the counter.
He turned and picked up the cookies, opening the bag so he could see what was inside. His eyes flicked to mine. “Mrs. Sampson told you I have a weakness for these, didn’t she?”
“She did. And she insisted the coffee is prepared just the way you like it. It’s the one on the left.”
He picked up his coffee and took a sip. “Did you tell her it was for me?”
“I didn’t have to. She seemed to have already figured it out.”
“She’s in the same book club as Janelle, along with half a dozen other folks from around town. Like I said, I’m sure the whole town knows I had you pressed up against a bookshelf.”
“Does that bother you?”
