Page 25 of Give In To Love
“You didn’t leave me hanging. And if your body was telling you rest was what you needed, I’m glad you listened. Now, tell me what you need. Did you eat? I can still heat up the soup.”
“I ate something earlier.”
“You wanna watch a movie? Do you have a go-to comfort watch on days like this?”
“I can just read my book. I’m sure you have homework to catch up on.”
“I’m happy to let you read if that’s what you want. But I’d also love nothing more than to watch a movie with you if you think it will help.”
He turned his head to look up at me. “Are you sure? You don’t have homework?”
His eyes held mine, pulling me into their endless depths. God, I wanted to kiss him. But I didn’t think that was what he needed in this moment. “I don’t have any homework that can’t wait. And if you don’t tell me what you want to watch, I’m going to put on the most annoying thing I can think of until you tell me.”
He laughed softly. “I have a weakness for eighties movies.Breakfast Club, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Goonies. Stuff like that.”
“Alright.Breakfast Clubit is.”
I got up, pulled my laptop out of my bag, settled next to him once again, and found the movie. He scooted over to give me space, but that was the last thing I wanted. I rearranged us so he was leaning into me with my arm wrapped around him. The laptop was in front of us on the bed. “Is this okay?”
He looked at me shyly and nodded. I brushed a hand through his curls, then kissed the top of his head, unable to resist.
I started the movie, but after twenty minutes, Jimmy was asleep, his body relaxing heavily into mine. My own eyelids were drooping as the weight of the day washed over me. I should have woken him. I should have crawled into my own bed. But, in that moment, I couldn’t convince myself he didn’t need me there. That I wasn’t helping him sleep by holding him. I couldn’t convince myself not to stay.
12
JIMMY
I awoketo the sensation of being wrapped in a cocoon of warmth. I was lying on my side, and from this angle, I couldn’t see a clock, but the room was completely dark, so I assumed it was sometime in the middle of the night. My blanket was pulled up to my chin, but there was an unfamiliar weight settled over my hip, and when I breathed deep, the faint scent of men’s deodorant or maybe body wash—something woodsy that reminded me of TJ—filled my nose. It took me a moment to clear enough fog out of my brain to register that the weight on my hip was an arm draped over me, holding me close, and the reason the scent reminded me of TJ was because itwasTJ.
TJ was in my bed and he was holding me.
He stirred in his sleep behind me, and I froze, thinking I’d awoken him, but then he shoved one of his feet between mine and burrowed in closer, his breath tickling the back of my neck. The position of our bodies felt intimate in a way I’d never experienced before, and though I knew I should, I couldn’t bring myself to pull away.
Lulled by the rhythmic pattern of his breathing and the cozy nest we were wrapped up in, I fell back asleep.
* * *
When I woke again,my bed was empty. I opened my eyes blearily, blinking to clear them and squinting against the sunlight streaming through the window. I looked around, noting the absence of TJ in the small space, feeling relieved that I wouldn’t have to confront the person who’d slept in bed with me last night and simultaneously hollow at the loss of his presence. It was an odd combination.
I turned to locate my phone, finding it plugged in on the charger next to my bed. I was fairly certain I hadn’t plugged it in, so I could only assume TJ had done it for me. I swiped the screen, noting I still had an hour to get ready for my first class of the day, and found a text from TJ waiting for me.
TJ
Good morning, sleepyhead. Sorry I had to head out before you woke up, but I figured you needed the sleep. I hope you’re feeling better!
I debated whether to respond. It was actually the best sleep I’d had in a long time. The kind that deserved a thank you. But I didn’t know how to word it in a way that didn’t make it sound sexual.Thank you for last nightmade it sound like we’d hooked up.Thanks for holding meandThanks for sleeping with meweren’t much better. In the end, I settled on:
Thanks. I am feeling better
Awkward. Stilted. But it got the job done.
I lay on my back, staring at the ceiling, thinking about the night before. How TJ had very sweetly brought me soup. How he’d patiently listened without judgment to my explanation of my anxiety. The way he’d insisted on putting on one of my comfort movies and then pulled me in to cuddle with him. No one had ever taken care of me like that. Not even Sammy. It made me wonder if there was more to it or if he was just a genuinely nice guy. It seemed a little above and beyond for a roommate or even a friend, but I hadn’t had a lot of male friends, so I wasn’t sure. The idea of him having extra feelings for me seemed pretty unlikely. What would he want with a shy, awkward, anxiety-ridden nerd like me?
My mind jumped to the other highlight of the night when I’d woken with his arm draped over me. To the way it felt to have the heat of his body pressed against me. The tickle of his breath against the back of my neck and how he’d slid his foot between mine. His thigh settling in the cleft of my ass, knee pressed against my taint.
My cock began to fill at the memory, ripples of heat dancing across my skin and lust thrumming in my veins. Hesitantly, I trailed my fingertips down my chest, over my sternum and belly, traveling lower to the waistband of my athletic shorts. I palmed my dick over the fabric, telling myself it was to tame my erection, but I only succeeded in stoking the flames.
Lusting after my roommate was madness. He’d only taken care of me last night because he was a nice guy. What kind of douche would it make me to jerk it to thoughts of him?
