Page 63 of Ecstasy
I shiver at his touch but don’t dare move.
“Yeah. I lied to him. I’m not lying to you.”
“But why?” I ask him, my voice hoarse as he keeps moving his thumb back and forth across my bare skin. I feel warmth spooling in my core, my insides turning to liquid. “Why did you lie to him? He was pissed at me.”
“He’s always pissed at you, baby girl.”
I hold his gaze a second, then turn to look out at the pool. He keeps his hand on my thigh, still running his thumb back and forth across my skin.
“Do you think he cares?” I ask without looking at him. “Is that why he asked Kylie to look after me?” I hate the rough edge to my voice, but I can’t help it.
Alex has been lying to me.
Or at the very least, he’s been keeping things from me. And Kylie? Fuck her. She was bullshitting me about Alex being a jerk. Or maybe she really thinks he is, but she fucking lied to me too.
Eli is quiet a moment, and his thumb moves closer to the edge of my bikini. The warmth under my skin is growing and I want to turn toward him, with his fingers higher, inside of me again.
But I need to hear this too.
“Probably,” he answers me. “But wouldn’t you rather know?”
I nod in the dark. “Yeah,” I admit, and his thumb grazes just under the thin material of my swimsuit. My next words are a little breathless. “I would want to know.”
Eli picks the red cup up with his free hand, moves it to his other side. I don’t dare move as he comes closer to me, his thigh brushing mine, his shoulder bumping against my arm. I can smell him, and his scent does things to me.
I press my thighs closer together, kicking my feet a little in the cold water of the pool.
“Why did you start?” he asks me quietly. His thumb slips under my swimsuit, and it’s hard to breathe. “Why did you start cutting?”
I bite my lip, still staring at the water.
I know he’s waiting for some tragedy and it makes my face burn with shame. I don’t have a tragedy. If that’s what he thinks we have in common, we don’t.
He shifts even closer, moves his hand, and pulls at the string of my bikini bottom until it comes undone. He slides his hand under the material, cupping me.
I turn toward him, and his eyes are on mine.
“Tell me, Zara. Why did you start hurting yourself?”
I stare at his mouth, his full lips, imagining them on my skin when I answer him. “I was lonely.”
He bites his lip, and runs his middle finger down my slit, parting my lips.
I suck in a breath and I see his lips pull up into a smile.
“Were you?” he asks me softly, leaning in closer. He puts his mouth on my shoulder, kissing me.
I nod, still staring at his mouth, then parting my thighs wider, giving him better access.
He lifts his head. “That night, when you and Alex fought. Why did you do it then?” He pulls me apart with his fingers, massaging my clit with his middle finger.
I take a shaky breath in, glance behind him at the sliding glass doors. Any moment, Alex could walk out here. He could come home early. He could catch us. He would kill us.
“Look at me, baby girl,” Eli commands me, sliding his finger lower.
I spread my thighs wider, wanting him inside of me.
He dips his finger down, and then he’s right there, teasing me.
