Page 91 of Break Me
“But you…you do.”
I stop breathing.
“You mean the world to me. And I wasn’t sure, at first…if what I do, what I am…if it would break you. I’m still not sure. But watching you drive that goddamn knife into Rolland’s back…” He whistles and I can’t help but smile, even though what he’s saying is so strangely morbid. “I knew I wouldn’t break you. But you…well, Princess, you were the one to break me.”
I feel his hand on my arm and turn to face him, holding his gaze in the dark car.
“What if…” I swallow past the lump in my throat as his hand moves up to cup my face. I lean into it, savoring his warmth. “What if you go back to prison?” I ask him quietly. “What do I do then?”
His hand stills on my cheek and he looks away. Maybe I shouldn’t have asked him. Maybe he doesn’t want to think about the time he was in prison. Maybe he doesn’t want to talk about this. But I don’t really care. It’s a reality we could both be facing, and it’s one I don’t want.
It’s not just dealing drugs that Benji does. It’s fucking murder.
He looks back at me, and his fingers trail down to my throat, gentle and feather-like. I shiver against his touch.
“I quit,” he says quietly.
Now it’s my turn to freeze.
What?
He continues before I have to ask. “I quit,” he says again, quietly, shrugging. “I handed over the business to my partner.”
I thread my fingers through his on my face. “You…what?” I ask, shaking my head. I hear him huff a laugh. “Are you serious?”
He laughs again, one hand on the steering wheel, the other still on my face. He’s turned completely to face me. “Yes, I’m serious. I told you, you broke me.”
“But what about…what about money?” I feel kind of petty asking it, and the reality is, I’ll have enough for both of us, but that doesn’t seem like something Benji would want. Living off of me.
“You really think I’m worried about money?” he asks me quietly.
“I mean…no. But I am.”
He laughs and threads his hand in my hair, pulling me closer to the center console. My hand goes to his corded forearm. I can feel his muscles beneath his jacket.
“We’ll be fine, Princess. More than fine.” I see his eyes flick to my mouth, and I want to move closer to him, but this fucking console is in my way. “That house Caden and Riley bought? We’ll have one like that. If you want it.”
“You want me to…you want me to move to Canada?” But Dad…I don’t know if he could cope if I left, although it’s not as if he’s been speaking to me much since Mom. But I know that’s his way of handling his grief. I don’t want to make it worse.
Benji’s fingers tighten in my hair. “You have to finish school, Princess,” he says quietly, leaning closer to me, pressing his brow to mine. I close my eyes and breathe him in. “But when you’re ready…yeah, I do want you to move. To be with me.”
“And if I don’t?” I ask, already knowing I will.
He pulls my hair gently, forcing my head up, my neck arched. I open my eyes, see him watching me.
“I’ll stay here with you until you change your mind.”
And then, abruptly, he lets me go and gets out of the car.
I sit up straight, confused, trying to find him in the sideview mirror but I can’t see him. Then a second later, he’s opening up my door and pulling me out by my arm.
“Benji, what the hell?” I ask him as he slams the door closed and keeps a firm grip on my arm as he leads me into the woods. It’s so fucking dark out here that it takes my eyes a few seconds to adjust and I nearly trip as we head off the dirt path and into a thick cluster of trees.
It’s not cold enough for my breath to fog, but it’s still pretty damn cold. I’m wearing a pink jacket and jeans, and thankfully, sneakers.
“What are you doing?” I ask him ahead of me, but he doesn’t look back, he just keeps pulling me deeper into the woods.
Finally, after I stumble in the leaves and dirt, he stops, then pushes me up against a tree, his hand on my chest, eyes on mine.
