Page 105 of These Monstrous Ties
I had tried to leave before, when I’d turned from Lucifer that night a year ago. When I had saidfuck this, and left. I’d unwittingly walked right into Jeremiah’s arms then. But I won’t again. I don’t know what happened to Ria that night, hell, I don’t even know what happened tome,but I’m going to find her.
And she’s going to make me understand what the hell is going on in this city.
* * *
That night,as I toss and turn in a hotel room across town, after fruitlessly searching for all the Rias that live in this city (there’s hundreds), I see smoke beyond my window. For a second, I wonder if the Unsaints found me that fast. If they followed me here. Or if it’s Jeremiah or one of his men.
I throw off my blankets, snatching up my knife from the nightstand. But I breathe a sigh of relief when I realize the fire is far off. It’s past the city, up on the highest hill in Alexandria.
It’s the Rain mansion, coming down in flames.
But it’s something else, too.
It’s a warning.
Epilogue
Jeremiah
Present
There’s somuch blood in the bathtub, I don’t understand how I’m still alive. It’s turned the water a bright red, and even though I can’t sit up, even though my head leans against the cool tiles at my back, I’m still here.
I’m still breathing.
I shouldn’t be.
I should have died that night I found her.
When I tried to stand a few minutes ago, the world spun around me. The hotel room shifted, what little blood I had draining too fast from my head.
I had had to sit back down, but I can’t reach for the razor. I’d thrown it over the side after carving up my arms.
My phone is somewhere in the Raven River, and no one will come to me, even if I call them.
My heart breaks for her. Even now, as I take in what I wish are my last breaths, I think of her. I want to hold her. To beg for her forgiveness. I would have crawled through glass for it. I would have swallowed glass for it. I would do anything for her to forgive me. To look at me with that little bit of love that had been growing since I found her that night.
That night that I should have died.
That night that vengeance made me into a monster.
But who the fuck am I kidding?
Jeremiah Rain has always been a monster.
I was five when my mom took her in. She was a toddler, long brown hair, strange grey eyes. I’d adored her, even then. How my mother was able to foster children when she couldn’t even take care ofme, her own, was beyond me. I knew even then I’d be the one to raise Sid.
And I did.
For three years, I watched out for her. Until the authorities finally came to their senses, and then, since we weren’t blood related, we were ripped apart. I would have burned through the world to find her.
I did.
I just didn’t know I’d burned through her, too.
It never mattered to me that she wasn’treallymy sister. Because she was. She still is, even after what I’ve put her through. Even after she chose him over me.Themover me. A holier-than-thou fucked up cult that I never really belonged to. I’d never been close to the Unsaints. They’d barely tolerated my presence. They’d only been intrigued by my story.
But she’s still my little sister.
