Page 36 of These Monstrous Ties
But maybe not.
I take a step closer, eyeing the wooden porch. There are dried leaves scattered around the screen door, but otherwise, it looks shockingly clean.
I think about turning around.
I think about jogging back down the path, jogging out of the park, finding Nicolas and speeding back to the mansion. I think this might have been one of my worst ideas ever. But before I can spin around, I hear something.
From behind me.
I aim the gun, arm extended, opposite hand on my elbow, and then I turn. But I don’t say a word. The dark forest stares back at me.
I try to swallow my fear. I have nothing to be afraid of. I have a gun and I know how to use it. And besides that, it was probably just an animal. Never mind that it sounded like a boot scraping against gravel.
Or maybe it’s Nicolas, trying to fuck with me.
I’m safe.
I say it again and again and again.
Safe.
And then a hand clamps over my mouth.
I know better than to pull the trigger, but I draw my arms in, try to elbow whoever is on my back. But their other arm pins mine to my sides, forcing the gun to point down, useless at the tips of my fingers.
I try to breathe. Inhale. Exhale. Repeat. I try to calm my pulse, try to fucking think. But right now, I can’t think at all. My mind is blank, my fear nearly palpable.
Because this person’s hand over my mouth, I can smell it.
Cigarettes, but a particular kind. I don’t know the brand; I’ve never smoked. But this scent is burned into my memory like so many other things I want to forget.
“You’re scared of me, Lilith?”
Lucifer’s voice is as hoarse as I remember it, his words brushing against my ear. I try not to shiver in his arms. Try, and fail.
He breathes a laugh against the back of my neck, then rests his chin on my head. His grip hasn’t loosened, not even a little. I don’t want to give him the benefit of squirming, of trying to uselessly fight back. Because I might have been trained, but something about the way he’s holding me, about the way he’s making sure the gun is pointed down…I know he and the Unsaints have been trained, too.
I hold still.
“Ah, Lilith. I’ve been waiting a long, long time for you to come back to hell.” He pulls me tighter against him, and I can feelhim, wantingme,against my back. Bile rises to my throat.
Not because I don’t want it.
But because I do.
And I hate that part of myself. I’m not an escort anymore, and I’m not his Lilith anymore, either. There’s no Death Oath between us tonight. We are nothing. And whether it’s tonight or on Halloween night to appease my brother, I’m going to kill him. And I’m going to make him suffer while I do.
But I still can’t deny the fact that some sick part of me likes this.
He moves his hand from my mouth, resting it against my throat. He presses his lips against my hair.
“Don’t you have anything to say to me?” he whispers against my hair.
I swallow. My mouth has gone suddenly dry. I have a lot to say. But I’m forgetting all of it. Every word.
“You’re staying here,” is the only thing I manage.
It isn’t a question, but he murmurs his agreement against my hair anyway. “And you came for me,” he breathes. “Did Jeremiah send you here?”
