I needed another shot from potentially bisexual bartender guy.
By the next morning, I’d had the promotion and “signing bonus.” I knew he’d puppet-mastered me into it. I just hadn’t realized how diabolical he’d been. I thought he’d taken advantage of a situation, not manipulated his admin into a sixty-day paid vacation.
“Not to stir up the rumor mill, Ally,” Nina said, pulling me out of my bitter fugue state, “but I think he likes you. Like really likes you.”
“Or hates you,” Missie added. “We honestly can’t decide. We go back and forth about it. I personally hope he hates you because he’s saving all his love for me. But he looks at you like he wants to throttle you or throw you out of a moving vehicle or—”
“Fuck your brains out,” Nina filled in helpfully.
I choked on my own spit. “Guys, I’m not like sleeping my way to the top. I assure you. And Dominic has no interest in me whatsoever.”
“First of all, you’re no Malina. You wouldn’t bang your boss to get ahead. You’d bang him because he’s so hot I bet he can make scrambled eggs on his abs,” Gola insisted. “He’s said that though? About not being interested in you?”
I closed my eyes. “On multiple occasions.”
“He’s lying. He’s totally lying,” Ruth squealed.
“I’ve never seen a man look at a woman like that. Like he’s a kid looking in the window of a candy store and he’s deciding if he’s willing to break the glass to get to the candy and devour it,” Missie said, glassy-eyed.
“Well, that’s an uncomfortable description,” I said.
I felt a thrill of heat work its way down my spine.
“He’s looking at you right now,” Nina said without moving her lips, which made it all the more suspicious. Everyone but me whipped around to zero in on Dominic.
“Definitely wants to throw her off a roof.”
“After he gives her like ten orgasms.”
“Can I please be you when I grow up?” Missie whisper-sang.
“Why wouldn’t you two just get together?” Ruth asked, fanning herself with a cocktail napkin.
“Besides the fact that I’m not his type, he’s not my type, he’s not interested in me, and sleeping with coworkers is a bad idea?”
“Yeah. Besides all that,” Ruth said.
“His dad,” I said.
I faced four confused-looking women. “We’re not picking up what you’re putting down,” Gola said.
“He takes your inability to stare directly into his beauty and your mad escapes to the men’s room to mean you’re afraid of him. You know, like you think he’s another pervert.”
Their resounding chorus of “Are you fucking kidding me?” was instantaneous and loud enough that half of the room turned to see what all the fuss was about.
“Oh my God! Pull yourselves together,” I said, shushing them.
“You know. If we lowered some of the barriers, maybe he’d make his move on Ally?” Ruth said.
“Lowered barriers? Guys, I don’t think we should be conspiring against management.”
“We’re conspiringforhim. Not against him,” Gola mused. “If Dominic understood that we thought he was a good boss, that we weren’t comparing him to his dad, maybe he’d break the glass and eat the candy.”
“No, no, no. Nope. Nope. Uh-uh. No one is conspiring against or for anything. No one is eating any candy.”
“Ally, you’re the kind of fairy tale we all need,” Nina insisted. “Poor country bumpkin—”
“Hey, I’m from Jersey, jerk.”