Page 43 of Entangled
But this chaotic look, I could get used to. It was nice to see someone else out of control with their life for once.
“There’s Tylenol in the cupboard to your left for your hangover,” I said, propping my chin on my hand and doing nothing to hide my smirk.
Without even saying a peep, he opened said cabinet and pulled out the bottle of pain reliever.
I laughed while making my own way to the coffee pot, while he leaned with his back against the counter, giving me his full attention. I could feel his eyes boring into my soul, like he could see every bit of darkness there, and he could see every thought, lie, and dream I’d ever had.
“Soren,” he started, while I added oat milk from the carton in the fridge to my mug. The oat milk that had just started showing up when I mentioned it one time in a coffee order to Kade.
“Hmm?” I replied, taking a sip of my coffee, and groaning internally at just how badly I needed this.
“I’m sorry about last night,” he answered, not taking his eyes off his coffee mug, refusing to look at me now that I was giving himmyfull attention.
“Which part?” I laughed. “The part where you stumbled into my bed at three in the morning, or the part where you snuck off in the middle of the morning and acted like it never happened?”
I tried not to sound bitter, but I sounded like it, despite my playful tone. I already wanted to stuff the words back into my mouth after I said them but knew that wasn’t a remote possibility.
He visibly grimaced, trying to hide it by taking a sip of his coffee.
“About any of it,” he said, finally meeting my eyes.
And damn it if it didn’t send a shot through my heart to know he regretted lying in bed with me, when it felt so good and peaceful to me. I was letting myself get attached when I shouldn’t. I was playing a dangerous game with my heart, and I needed to do what I’d been doing the last several years and keep it under lock and key.
“Don’t worry about it,” I waved him off, putting on my careless act, letting him think it didn’t bother me. It would make it hurt less.
I smiled at him before making my way out of the kitchen and towards the library, but not before he halted me, saying my name like a prayer.
“Soren, we can’t keep going on like this. It was stupid of me to sleep with you in the first place. Besides, the exchange goes down in three days. You need to make sure you’re ready.”
And I knew in my heart of hearts, he didn’t just mean packing my belongings. I had to prepare my heart to say goodbye too, and we both knew it. But neither of us made a move to do anything about it. Instead we were pretending it wasn’t a problem to begin with.
The wall of armor slowly started building back around my heart, needing to be more fortified than ever.
Because I was going from being a prisoner with free will back to the prisoner of a monster in three days’ time.
“I’m sorry you feel that way,” I replied, failing to keep my voice from shaking. “Thank you for sending me back to my own personal hell with my monster of a husband.”
I was seething mad, childishly so, and I couldn’t help it. I wanted him to hurt as badly as he’d hurt me.
“You’re forgetting that I’m a monster too, Soren! We were never supposed to be together in the first place! You’re not supposed to be attached to me!”
“I’m so sorry to disappoint you, Kade. I guess that means that I’m in love with a man who believes he’s a monster. But really he’s just a sad, lost man, who gave me nothing but empty promises about being a knight in shining armor who would save hisprincessfrom her tower,” I yelled, waiting and hoping for a response. Hoping he’d do what he always said he would andfightfor us.
“If I really meant anything to you at all, you’d keep your word, instead of acting like a scared little boy,” I choked out, not giving him a chance to reply before I stormed off to my bedroom, locking the door and falling to the floor, tears flowing freely down my cheeks.
19
KADE
Although I couldn’t seeher face, I could feel the hurt coming off of her in waves. There was no other way to tell her that her world was about to come crumbling down and that I wasn’t able to keep my promise.
I felt like a knife had stabbed my heart as I broke that promise to her that I’d made with such conviction. But what could I do in three days’ time? My mind was blank on ways and ideas to save her, lest I put a bullet through Jude’s head myself, which I would be lying if I said wasn’t immensely tempting.
Even if I sent her far away with a bucket of money to an unknown location, I knew that the Mafia would find her.
It’s what they were good at.
Nobody ever escaped them and got away with it. Nobody ever lived to tell the tale.
