Page 17 of Once Upon An Ever After
Dawson parked his Audi in the reserved space in the parking garage and they left the car, taking the elevator up to the loft on the third floor of the building. It was an incredible space. An old industrial building that had been converted into lofts, it had exposed brick walls and finished cement floors. Dawson had filled it with comfortable brown leather sofas, a big screen tv on the main wall and in one corner there was a massive bed that Beau had tried hard never to look at for too long when he’d been in the space in the past.
Now, his gaze caught on the comfortable looking pillows and blankets. His breathing sped and his mind whirled. He couldn’t help but wonder if tonight, finally, would be the night he found out if Dawson had expensive Egyptian cotton sheets.
Dawson tossed his jacket over the back of the sofa and turned to him almost as soon as the door clicked shut behind them, “I’m sorry.”
Beau blinked, confused by the first words the man he loved had decided to speak, “What? Why?“
“For acting like a lunatic earlier. I’m sorry and I’ll apologize to Jonny and to Tyson if need be. I just saw you with him, saw him touching you and…” Dawson shook his head sheepishly, “I lost it.”
Beau nervously licked his lips, “It isn’t like you to lose your head.”
“I know.”
“You’re usually very reserved, especially in public where people might be watching.”
“I know.” Dawson ran a hand through his hair, “But I didn’t think about that tonight. I didn’t think about anything except how much I hated seeing another man touching you.”
Beau took a cautious step forward, “Because…?”
Dawson’s face softened, “You know why.”
“Say it anyway.” He moved another step closer, “Say it again.”
Dawson moved into his personal space, not touching him, but putting them nose to nose. He met Beaus eyes and a flicker of a smile twisted his lips upward. He licked his lips and Beau’s gaze got stuck there, watching the way that mouth he had fantasized about for a year formed the words he had longed to hear.
“I love you, Beau.” Dawson spoke quietly, “I know all the reasons you have not to believe me. I know I’ve told you again and again that I don’t feel that way about you; that we are just friends, but I was wrong. I was lying to you, and to myself, because I was scared. I was scared of how my life would change if I admitted my heart was yours but I realized something over the last few days.”
“Wh-what’s that?” Beau swallowed past the lump in his throat.
“I’m more scared of losing you than I am of being gay or bisexual or whatever label they want to put on me. Hell, they already label me. They always have. I’ve never cared before and I’m not going to start now.” He leaned toward just enough to brush their lips together as he breathed, “You’remy sexuality, Beau. Just you. It’s always been you. You’re the only person I’ve ever wanted to be with like this, the only person I can see myself being with forever.”
Beau groaned as the taste of Dawson sparked him to life as if he was kindling, “Are you sure? I need you to be sure.”
“I’ve never been so sure of anything.” Dawson nibbled on his lower lip.
“But if I do anything that makes you uncomfortable, or if we move too fast, you have to promise to talk to me about it. You can’t just shut me out.”
“Same goes for you.”
“Deal.”
Dawson’s smile was beautiful and wide, “Deal.”
Beau’s heart felt full to bursting. He had dreamed about this day. He had wished for it and hoped for it. But some part of him, the rational, reasonable part of him, had still doubted that it would ever really come. Yet here he was, in Dawson’s apartment, in Dawson’s arms, his best friend in the world telling him that he loved him and wanted to be with him.
“Beau?” Dawson slid an arm around him and pressed their bodies together.
“Hmm?“
“Will you touch me now? Please?”
Beau groaned against the side of Dawson’s neck, “I thought you’d never ask.”
When he pressed his lips to Dawson’s he could feel the answering smile there and it filled him with so much hope he could barely breathe. God he’d wanted this for so long. The night in his apartment felt like it had been nothing but a dream compared to this, here, now. This was real. Dawson was here, with him and he didn’t have to worry or doubt that they were on the same page. He could simply take in everything about this man that he had loved for so long, soak in the warmth of his kiss and the sound of his pleasure. He could go slow because he knew that this was just the first night of many that he would be able to spend in Dawson’s arms.
They pushed and pulled at one another’s clothes. First ties and then jacket and then shirts. But when Dawson reached for the belt around his hips, Beau broke the kiss with a groan. He stilled Dawson’s hands with his own. He leaned their foreheads together, looking into those silvery blue eyes that had ensnared him from the first glance.
“We don’t have to rush. We don’t have to do anything right now. You know that right?”
