Page 13 of Should've Been Us
“No shit.” He muttered quietly before he growled, “Jesus, Lu, how drunk are you? You just walked right past yourdoor.”
She stopped, looked around, and turned back to scowl at him. He was right of course. He was standing in front of her door four steps behind her. Dammit, all of these pathways and bungalows looked the same. But she knew it wasn’t just the alcohol that was distractingher.
It was him. Him and his stupid, judgmental bullshit. He drove hercrazy.
“How do you know which room is mine?” She narrowed her eyes as she marched back towardshim.
“Because mine is right nextdoor.”
“But how do you know this one ismine?”
“Best man. I know everyone’s roomnumber.”
“I’m the bestman.”
“No, you’re not.” Hefrowned.
“Yes, Iam.”
“No.”
“Yes,I…”
“You’re not the best man, Lu! You’re not a man. You’re a woman. Maybe Derek is too fucking stupid to realize that but I’m not so stop arguing with me over dumb shit and unlock your door so I can make sure you get your drunk ass into bed before you push me too far and I do something we’ll bothregret.”
Her soggy mind whirled when he all but yelled at her but she pulled out the key card and swiped it over the reader. The lock unclicked and Connor pushed it open, holding it for her and then following her inside. She didn’t even think to tell him to get out as she unsnapped her necklace and put her jewelry on top of thedresser.
He’d said something that sank in, past all of the booze, down to the loneliest parts ofher.
“I’m not the best man.” She admitted in a small voice. “I’m not the bestanything.”
Connor’s sigh was heavy in the quiet room, “That’s nottrue.”
“Isn’t it though?” She glanced up to find him standing beside the bed, hands on his hips, a look she couldn’t read on his face. “I’m not the girl that ever gets picked first. I’m nothing but anafterthought.”
“Lu...” He swiped a hand over his face, “Get in bed. Please. You’re drunk and you’re not making anysense.”
“I make perfect sense and you know it.” She unzipped the side of her sundress and shrugged out of it. “You just hate admitting when I’mright.”
Connor sucked in audible air when her dress his the ground, “Why the hell are you taking your clothes off in front ofme?”
“I’m going to bed. I’m not sleeping in my dress.” She glanced down at her bra and panties and shrugged indifferently. “This covers as much as a swimsuit. Don’t have a coronary Connor. I’m not trying to seduce you if that’s what you’re worriedabout.”
He growled something she couldn’t understand beneath his breath as she stepped past him and crawled beneath the covers, pulling them up to her chin. He hadn’t moved. He was still standing exactly where he’d been before when she looked back at him. Only his eyes were closed and his chest was moving up and down in deepbreaths.
It was like he couldn’t even stand the sight of her. She was that awful. She curled in on herself, hating the doubts that were swirling in her head, hatingherself.
“Connor?”
“Yeah?” His voice was tense and he answered before his eyes flicked open and foundhers.
“Why doesn’t anyone wantme?”
“Lu…” He groaned, “Don’t. Just go tosleep.”
“I heard them talking about the bet, about the other bridesmaids. I’m not even part of it. It’s like I’m invisible. It’s like I don’t even exist. I thought, all this time I thought Derek couldn’t see me but he does. He just doesn’t want what he sees. Nobodydoes.”
Connor stared at her for a long moment, his brows furrowed. His mouth opened and then closed as if he wanted to say something but stopped himself. When his face went soft, she recognized the look there and turned her head away before the rush of tears could comeagain.
