Page 63 of A Me and Him Thing
Kate has the manners bug too. Ren has reason to be proud of his kids. They have been raised well.
I pull a small bottle of perfume from my purse and teach Kate how to put a very small dab behind her ears and at her wrists.
“I smell so pretty now.”
“You do. More importantly, you’re pretty on the inside.”
“Grandma says that’s the part that matters most. But I don’t get it. No one can see the inside.”
“We can. We see how good you are through the light in your eyes and through your huge smile, through the things you say and the things you do.”
Can anyone see that I’m good on the inside? My mother always called me feisty—and she was proud of that trait. She saidI wasn’t afraid to fight or argue. It’s true. I’ve never held back when I had something to say, many times not thinking it through first. That kind of behavior was encouraged in my home. It’s gotten me into trouble, though, and I’m learning to tame the beast. I’ll always be honest about my opinion and say what I’m thinking, but there’s a right way and a wrong way to go about it. My mistakes with Sawyer and Quinn have knocked me down a peg or two. I’m happy being low on the pegboard. I don’t plan on climbing back up. It’s not so much that I want other people to like me.
I want to like me.
Ren and Ethan join us. Ethan is now wearing his elusive shoes. I notice Ethan is also holding an envelope.
Conjectures about Ren’s life are filling my thoughts. My heart feels heavy in my chest, like it weighs more than it used to. Like seventy pounds more. There’s a part of me that wants to lash out, demand that Ren tell me everything right now, this minute.
There’s another part of me that feels empathy for this little family. Everyone seems just a tad needy. That’s okay. I am too. We fit together for that very reason.
We climb into Ren’s car and set off down the tree-lined driveway. I look forward to returning this afternoon for dinner and seeing more of Ren’s life.
I think.
“Tell me more about your week,” Ren says to Kate and Ethan.
They don’t stop talking as we drive, telling their father about every little detail of their week at school, from what they had for lunch to which playground equipment they played on. I wonder if this is tradition as they go on their father/children outing each week to…I don’t know where. The anticipation is making my nerves taut. I look down at my hands and command them to stop wringing.
“Kate,” Ren interrupts, looking in his rearview mirror. “Don’t lean on the car door.”
“It’s closed tight and locked,” Kate tells her father.
“It’s not safe.”
I don’t mention logs because he has a point.
It doesn’t take long to realize we’re driving back into Portland. Before I know it, we’re back in the neighborhood where both Ren and I live.
As we make a few turns, the car goes silent. The constant chatter has been replaced by sullen Kate and Ethan staring out the windows.
What’s with the mood change? Even Ren is quietly frowning. In spite of the somber mood, Ren stops at a small flower shop. “Be right back.”
He returns with a bouquet of sunflowers.
“Can I hold them, Dad?” Kate asks. “Her favorite.”
“Sure, sweetheart.”
Who’s her? I can guess, but I’m in denial.
Ren swings the car into a driveway, then deftly parks. We’re only minutes from my townhome. I’ve passed this building numerous times, always pausing to admire its beauty. It’s a large L-shaped building that surrounds a brick courtyard with a fountain. The rust-colored tile roof, white stucco exterior, and numerous oval windows make for a stunning structure. The landscaping is pristine with well-tended flower beds and expertly trimmed shrubbery.
Tranquility House Long-Term Care Hospital.
I’ve always added an addendum to their title: For the Rich and Famous. Who could possibly afford to send their loved one to this hospital? I’ve always wondered if I’d see a movie star or a rock star hanging out in the courtyard as they relax after a stressful visit with a loved one.
Why are we here?
