Page 58 of A Me and You Thing
“What else did you want to talk about, Beezy?” I grin. She loves when the girls call her Beezy, but hates when I do.
“You are not allowed to call me that. You mastered the letter R many years ago. No excuse.” Bree’s eyes are bright, belying her curt words.
“Poow spowt.”
“Stop it. Now I’m oddly turned on.”
“The way to Bree’s heart. Drop my R’s. Duly noted.” We both chuckle lightly. “So what’s the scoop?”
“It’s about your master bedroom.”
That sobers the mood quickly. “What about it?”
“I am going to be moving in there, right?”
“Yep.” I lean over and kiss her again, this time holding it a little longer. I try not to think about Quinn—and fail. “Of course.”
“The thing is, and I quote,it’s haunted.”
Caught again. “Those were my exact words, weren’t they?” It’s still haunted. It always will be. I can’t say I want that to change.
“Yes, and I agree. So, I would like your permission to redecorate and make that room ours. I know this is hard for you and I get it. It’s hard for me too. But her clothes are still hanging in the closet. Don’t you think it’s time, Sawyer?”
I click my tongue as I think about what she’s saying. “I guess it is. It just feels like...”
“Losing her all over again.”
I let out a deep breath. Bree gets me. “Honestly, yes. Every little milestone is like living through it all again.”
“If you’d like, I’ll do it. You’ll come home from work and everything will be gone. There’s a women’s shelter downtown that I know will appreciate the donation.”
I stare at the white picket fence again and try not to groan aloud. Anything sentimental I wanted of Quinn’s is already tucked away in a box in my closet, to include a few mementos for Josie and Jordyn when they’re older. “Okay. Thank you. That’ll make it easier.” I clear my throat. “The redecorating, though, let’s do that together after our honeymoon. The wedding plans alone are enough right now. Let’s not overwhelm ourselves.”
“Good point. I love that we’ll have a new room for our new life though. We need it.” Bree sounds satisfied.
Yes, a new life. I need it. If only it could be delirious.
Perhaps it will be. I just need to give it a chance and let it happen. There’s absolutely no reason why I can’t find deliriously happy with Bree. I’m halfway there already. I owe it to her to give this relationship my all.
“I love you,” I tell her.
She smiles and her eyes flash.
She has brought me back to life and held this home together. I’m looking forward to our married life. I really am.
TWO DAYS AND an achingly empty closet later, I’m working in my office, trying to finish up a bit of paperwork so I can relax and enjoy the evening with Bree.
I pause and listen to the sounds of Bree reading bedtime stories to Josie and Jordyn. She’s the only mother they remember, but every night before they go to bed, she points to Quinn’s framed picture that hangs prominently on the wall of their bedroom. She reminds the girls to say goodnight to their mother and to give her lots of kisses. The girls proceed to blow her kisses over and over. Every single night without fail.
I love that Bree keeps Quinn’s memory alive in this manner. In a small way, our daughters still hold her in their hearts. It’s important to me that they do. I know the day will come when they’ll ask about her and want to know more. I have so much to tell them about her. Especially about how much she loved them.
I strain my ears because I think I hear knocking on the door. Then the doorbell chimes. I hop to my feet to answer it. “I got it, Bree,” I say as I walk past the girls’ bedroom.
“Hey, can you bring up two cups of water for the girls? Use the small Dixie cups on the kitchen counter.”
I’m halfway down the stairs, but I answer as I head for the door. “Okay, I’ll be up in a minute.” Like all children around the world, bedtime arouses sudden thirst. I swear Josie and Jordyn become camels at this time of night.
I throw open the door, a greeting on the tip of my tongue that dies a sudden death. The sight that meets me leaves me stunned, speechless, and fighting to remain conscious as I question my mental stability.
