Page 5 of Bear
5
Lana
After breakfast,we head straight bay to my house. Bear starts working right away. I try and help, but more often than not I just end up getting in the way. It’s much easier to keep the coffee coming and to pass him tools and to tidy up after him. Let Bear do what he does best. Which is apparently fixing up homes. Although, I’d be willing to bet he has a few other skills, too. Namely, in the bedroom department.
At first, I was kind of scared of Bear. But the more time I spend around him, the more I’m finding myself attracted to him. Like… seriously attracted to him. Like, I can’t stop picturing what it would be like to have him carry me upstairs and sink his long, hot cock deep inside me.
He’s so strong. So big. So good with his hands. My panties get so wet watching him work, I have to sneak off and put on a dry pair.
Normally, he wouldn’t really be the type of guy I’m attracted to. A man’s man. An Alpha.
Huge and covered in muscles. A thick, brown beard. Tattoos. Tight, dark jeans, and a plaid shirt and boots and the kind of guy that drives pick-up trucks and goes bow hunting and knows how to ride a horse. But maybe that’s been my problem. I’ve always just gone for whatever guy gave me the slightest bit of attention. I have so little self-esteem. Sometimes I find it hard to believe any guy would be interested in me. But, unless I'm reading things totally wrong, it seems like Bear wants me almost as much as I want him.
Luckily, there’s a lot of work to be done on my house. He’ll be here for at least another week. That’s when I have to go back to work, too. I don’t know if I can be in the same room as him that long without giving in to temptation. And then what?
What if I scare him away? What if I’m reading the signs wrong and I hit on him and then he leaves and never comes back and I’m still left with a house that’s half falling apart. I’ve already lost one contractor. I can’t afford to lose another. But thinking like that makes me feel kind of shitty. Like I’m using Bear. Which, I guess I am. He hasn’t even mentioned payment. And the couple of times I’ve tried to bring it up, he’s told me not to worry about it. That he owes Eddy, my brother, a few favors, and that he’s happy to help.
But, it’s hard to believe someone would go to this much trouble for free. It’s almost suspicious...
Maybe heisdoing this to get in my pants. And if that’s the case, I might as well tell him he doesn’t have to try that hard. All he’d have to do is put his arm around me and whisper in my ear, and I’d probably melt against him like butter on a slice of hot toast and when I open my eyes my clothes would probably have magically disappeared and I’d be pulling his fat dick out his jeans and lowering my mouth to his tip and running my tongue all over his manhood while massaging his probably oversized balls with my tiny looking, chubby hands.
“Lana!” I turn around with a start. “Hello? Earth to Lana!”
“Jesus!” I put my hand on my chest. “You gave me a fright, Eddy! What are you doing here?”
“I thought I’d pop by and see how you’re getting on.” He takes me by the elbow and leads me into the kitchen. When he talks, his voice is low. “You and Bear getting on alright? I know he can be pretty intense sometimes. But he’s really okay, once you give him a chance.”
“Me and Bear are getting on just fine,” I say, trying not to blush. Just seconds ago I was thinking about having his cock in my mouth, and now I’m talking to my brother. My much older brother. Who was practically a father to me when I was growing up. Filling in for my actual father, who was mainly absent and drunk and wouldn’t know what being a good dad was if it suddenly turned into a bottle of whiskey, danced along the bar and slapped him in his no-good, waste-of-space mouth. “It was a little rocky at first,” I admit. “But I think we’ve patched things up now.”
“Good.” Eddy lets out a sigh and leans against the counter. “You sounded really freaked out on the phone last night. I just wanted to make sure you were doing okay.”
“Urgh,” I flashback to last night and cringe. I was being such a baby. I can’t believe I panicked like that. I’m usually so calm and collected. But I guess nobody’s immune from a total freak out now and then.
A thought pops into my head. Something I’ve been wondering about ever since Bear showed up on my front door. “Eddy,” I say. “How exactly do you know Bear? He’s been living in the mountains for the best part of a decade. And as far as I know, you can barely go twenty-four hours without a hot shower, your car, and your phone.”
“Bear?” he says, already with his phone in his hand, flicking through Instagram and hardly paying attention to me now. “He was my landlord.”
“Landlord?” The news shocks me. I know Bear said he had a normal life and a normal job. But the idea of him doing something as mundane as renting houses doesn’t seem to compute with the big, burly man next door who I’ve been fantasizing about.
“Sure,” he says, smiling at his screen. “He has a ton of properties all over the place. The guy’s totally loaded. Not that you’d know it by looking at him.”
“You mean… the guy who’s working for free in my living room right now, the guy who’s planning on spending the week sleeping in his truck and eating his meals on a camping stove in my garden… is a millionaire?”
Eddy looks at me like I’m crazy. “I thought I mentioned all this before?”
“No, Eddy,” I say. “I think I would have remembered you telling me this.”
I look down at the clothes I’m wearing. At yesterday’s dirt smeared across my jeans. At the little bit of egg yolk I spilled on my shirt at breakfast. I think about what I must look like without any makeup. With my hair all wet and ratty looking. How I thought Bear liked me. Wanted me. And how stupid that sounds now that I know he’s not only devastatingly handsome, but also rich.
My heart feels like it’s being crushed into a million pieces. Like one of those cars they put in that machine at the junkyard that squashes it all up, and the glass breaks and then spits it out in a deformed, square blob about a tenth of the original size.
“Anyway,” Eddy says, but I can barely hear him over the voice in my head screaming at me and laughing at how dumb I am. “I better be going. You need anything, you give me a call.”
He kisses me on the cheek. I nod at him. “I need anything, I’ll call,” I repeat.
But the only thing I need is a hole to climb into. Somewhere I can stay and wallow in my shame and forget about how stupid I've been.
6
