Page 66 of Escape Velocity
They finally find their way into the clearing. The patch of land is still riddled with branches. The tall pines keep towering over them, like it was a protecting their sacred area, just as they wanted it to be.
“It still looks the same,” Mason says as he spins around slowly, looking at the trees and their branches.
Echoes of laughter and giggles erupt in his mind as he pictures he and Callum running around with wooden swords and wearing crowns made of twigs, pretending that they were rulers of their own kingdom.
They couldn’t be any more different now.
Callum puts his hands in his jacket pockets and huffs. “I uh… I came here to think a lot before I went off to Montgomery. I still do when I’m back home… it makes me feel safe.”
Mason’s lip quivers as he looks up at Callum and how sad he looks when he says it.
There’s so much unsaid behind those words. Their kingdom only existed in the context of the both of them. If Callum kept going back, it only means that he must have missed Mason.
“Then why did you stop talking to me, Callum?” Mason asks in a small voice, like he’s scared of the answer.
He is scared. He’s filled in the blanks ever since it happened, with a million different answers, each one more hurtful than the next. It never made sense to him.
Callum sighs and sits on one of the rocks and runs a hand through his hair.
It’s quiet. Only the whistling of the wind through the trees keeps them company.
“I… I can’t—I don’t know how to say it. I can’t… I’ve never been good at saying how I feel or even understanding it myself…”
Mason takes a step towards him, the smaller shape of Callum as a boy becoming more apparent as he looks at him longer, like he’s gone so long without really taking a good look at him that he couldn’t see that boy was still there under the surface, hoping someone would pull him out.
“Well try, Callum. Now’s your only chance. We’re here for a reason,” Mason says, trying to be firm. He knows he should try being more understanding, but Callum wants to make it up to Mason, and the first thing he can do is at least explain why.
Callum rubs his chin and furrows his eyebrows like he’s concentrating on the football field and deciding his next play. It looks a lot like when Mason’s stuck on a particularly hard physics problem.
“Let me get one thing straight… I don’t want you to feel bad for me. And I’m not trying to excuse anything. I know I messed up—badly. I just want you to know that, Mason. I don’t want to make it seem like I’m downplaying anything I did.”
Mason inhales and nods, kicking the pine needles under his feet, making two empty foot shapes in the soil.
Callum sighs. “I—It was my dad. That’s all I really know.”
Mason furrows his eyebrows. He’s very unsure of what Callum means by that. Mr. Brown was never fond of Mason and had tried so many times to keep them apart, but it never fully worked. They still hung out at school after Mr. Brown forbade them from seeing each other, so Callum’s explanation doesn’t make a lick of sense.
Mason opens his mouth, but Callum interrupts him. “I know what you’re going to say. I don’t mean it was actually him. It—I just remember that his voice got so… loud.”
Mason takes his hands out of his jacket pockets and crosses his arms. “Loud?”
Callum’s face falls like he’s embarrassed.
“It’s all I can hear sometimes. His voice. Telling me how bad I am. How much of a shitty son I am. Especially when I lose a game or… do anything but win. Even then…”
Callum rubs the back of his neck and looks down at the ground. Mason has this feeling that Callum might be close to crying, but he’s not going to push Callum to do anything.
“When I started my sophomore year at Northwood, it—it got even worse. And all I could think was… what could I do to get him to stop? How could I get everyone to think I’m going to go pro? Just so I could stop lying awake at night hoping I don’t wake up to more berating from him?”
Mason sighs. He starts to feel uneasy at the words Callum isn’t explicitly saying.
“And then… it happened. Joel Whitlock and… and all the football players. I had to surround myself with them. Joel had connections to the NFL… some of my teammates knew other people… it was my only out. If I succeeded, I could get out of my house and make enough money to never see him again.”
Mason’s breath catches in his throat.
“All I want is to be away from him. I love football, but in the end, I just want to make enough money to never seem him again.”
Callum finally looks up at Mason, but quickly looks away as Mason notices his glistening eyes.
