Page 55 of The Redemption of Alex Cade
Rage surged through me, hot and blinding. My hands clenched, itching for violence, for action, for anything that would release the fury that clawed at my chest. Kelvin, turning up at Kit’s and demanding to be let in. Kelvin, breaking into Kit’s home. I should have pushed back harder and faster, got into his face, confronted him with everything I had. But I hadn’t. Instead I’d enabled him to do what he’d done tonight, because I’d not pushed back hard enough.This time he’d not just crossed a line, he’d obliterated it. And he was going to pay.
“Where’s Buster now?” I asked, trying my hardest to keep my voice calm as I led Kit, still holding tight to me as though afraid I’d disappear if he loosened his grip, into the living room where I eased him down onto the sofa.
Kit’s hands trembled as he gestured toward the back of the house. “I buried him. In the garden. Under the pear tree. I—I couldn’t leave him like that. I couldn’t—” His voice cracked again, and fresh tears spilled down his cheeks. “I just kept digging. The mud… I kept slipping over, but I didn’t care. I had to do it. I had to.” He clutched at me, his shoulders quaking as his sobs shook him. I wrapped my arms around him, holding him tighter than I’d ever done before.
Jesus Christ. Kit, alone in the rain, scared to death, crying as he dug a grave for a mutilated cat; the image branded itself onto my brain. My teeth ground hard as my fury reached boiling point. I couldn’t let this go. I wouldn’t. Kelvin had sent a message, and now I was going to send one back.
“I’m going to deal with this. Right now. I’m not letting him get away with it.”
“What?” Kit’s head snapped up as he lurched backward, his eyes wide with panic. “No—Alex, no. You can’t.”
“This is it, Kit. He’s done. He thinks he can do this to you, that I’lllethim? He doesn’t know who the fuck he’s messing with, not this time.”
“Please.” Kit’s voice cracked, rising in pitch as his fear grew. “Please, Alex. Don’t leave me. You can’t—he might come back. What if he’s still out there? What if?—”
“He’s not coming back.” No, Kelvin wouldn’t be back, because he’d done everything he’d set out to do.
“I can’t—I can’t be alone. Not now. Please, Alex. Don’t go. Please.”
His voice sliced through the haze of my fury. I looked at him, really looked at him, as I pushed down on my molten hot anger. The sight made my chest ache. Kit looked like he was about to shatter, and I understood, with a sickening pang, that if I walked out that door that’s what would happen. I wouldn’t, couldn’t, do that to him.
“I—” The words caught in my throat, tangled with the anger that still burned hot and sharp in my chest. My hands bunched and flexed, torn between the need to hold Kit and the need to destroy Kelvin. I wanted to do both. I needed to do both.
“Please,” Kit whispered again, his voice hardly above a whisper. “I need you.”
Kit collapsed against me. There was no way I could leave him alone. I’d deal with Kelvin, even if it took the last breath in my body, but here and now it was Kit, and what he needed, that mattered most.
“Okay.” I kissed his hair, keeping my voice calm and level. “Okay, Kit. I’m not going anywhere. I promise.”
He sagged against me, his body going limp, like a puppet whose strings had been cut. I took his hands in mine. They were still caked with mud, his nails broken from where he’d dug through the earth; the sight made something twist painfully in my chest.
“I should have protected him.” Kit’s voice was so quiet I almost didn’t hear him. “I should have?—”
“This isn’t your fault,” I said, cutting him off. “You understand? This is on Kelvin. No one else.”
“But—” His voice cracked. “I can still see him. Buster. I can’t stop seeing him. The blood, the way he was left, like he was nothing more than a piece of rubbish.”
My fury simmered just beneath the surface, begging for release, but I forced it down. Kelvin would have to wait. Right now, Kit was breaking apart in front of me, and I had to hold him together. I placed a couple of fingers under his chin, coaxing his head up. “Look at me. Kit, look at me.”
He did, and Jesus but it nearly broke me, as he stared back at me with so much hopeless desolation in his eyes all I wanted to do was weep.
“Come on.” I brushed his damp hair back from his forehead. “Let’s get you cleaned up, okay?”
He didn’t argue, didn’t resist as I guided him upstairs to the bathroom. The house felt eerily silent around us, the kind of silence that pressed in from all sides and made you feel like you were suffocating.
I turned on the shower, adjusting the temperature until steam started to rise. Kit stood motionless in the center of the room, his arms hanging limply at his sides, his gaze far away.
“Arms up,” I said gently, reaching for the hem of his mud-streaked shirt.
He obeyed without a word, letting me peel away his clothes.
“You’re freezing.” His skin was like ice under my touch. “Let’s get you clean and warmed up.”
I helped him step into the shower, holding him steady as the warm water cascaded over him. For a moment, he just stood there, his head bowed, his arms dangling at his sides. I shed my own clothes and stepped in with him. Taking a sponge, I squirted it with shower gel, its warm vanilla scent filling the cubicle. Slowly, little by little, I began to wash away the mud that caked his skin, working methodically from top to bottom. Last of all, I washed his hair. He stood still, letting me take care of him.
“I’ve got you. You’re okay. You’re safe now.” My stomach clenched. I’d promised him safety before, and failed him. This time, it was a promise I’d keep, no matter what I had to do, or to whom.
When the water finally ran clear and the mud was gone, I turned off the shower and grabbed a towel. Kit shivered as the cool air hit his wet skin, and I quickly wrapped the towel around him, rubbing and patting him dry. He didn’t say anything, but his eyes stayed locked on mine, wide and vulnerable, as though he was afraid I might disappear if he looked away.
