Page 102 of Before Broken Vows
His jaw flexes, then relaxes. He's somewhere else right now, probably still in that hangar, still doing whatever it took to bring Xander out alive.
But beneath it all, I recognize something else.
Guilt.
He carries it like a second skin.
He thinks he failed us.
"Hey," I say softly, smiling to get his attention. "You're too loud over there. Can you keep it down?"
He gives me a small, forced smile and shifts in his seat. His hand moves toward the bourbon, but he doesn't touch it.
"What are you thinking about?" I ask, already knowing part of the answer.
"Everything," he says.
"Well, I want you to know that I am so thankful you brought him back to me, Theo. You did what had to be done without hesitation. Without fear or..." I stop to think of what else to add. "I don't know, just... you did it. I mean, you came out covered in blood. Not everyone can do that, or would."
He looks down at himself. "Jesus, I was so focused on us getting out of there, I forgot about the blood."
"There's always blood on you, Theo. Either figuratively or literally," I say, looking into those blue eyes of his. "But you're the only man I'd ever follow through fire."
He smiles. It's genuine this time.
"With you, and now him," he says, nodding to Xander, "I always try to avoid the flames."
As I look at him, I realize there's something I haven't told him. Not fully.
Not in the way he deserves.
"We need you, you know. He needs you," I say and pause. "I need you. I should have never left, Theo," I say, feeling my eyes swell with tears.
"I'd be lying if I said that our time apart wasn't the darkest period in my life. I was lost. Spiraling, even. But I understand. If I was you, hearing what my father said, knowing about my family... I'd probably have done the same thing. I'm glad me and my brothers have a different view of how the family should be run. My father had an old way of thinking."
And just like that, Theo knows how to balance understanding and confidence.
He strips away all my armor. All the pressure.
And what's left is the truth.
"I know I've already said it. But I'm never leaving again. I love you, and death will be the only thing that breaks us apart again."
Theo gets up and comes over to me and kisses me passionately. Deeply.
"Until death, Stassi."
"What's next? What do we do?"
He sighs and sits next to me.
"I need to let my family know about Xander. Not only because he's my son, but because him, you, the letter you got—it's all connected to my father."
I look at him, confused.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, when Ares found my father, there was a note: 'The sons will follow the father.' And when I found Milo, he said that exact thing to me."
