Page 27 of A Sense of Fate
‘Well anyway, I sometimes feel as though I am living my life under a microscope.’
‘Standards are there for a reason, and there will always be those who disapprove of people who flout them. You must have been aware of that when you insisted upon living alone. Don’t let it overset you. You are stronger than you think.’
‘Thank you.’ She sighed. ‘I hope you are right about that, but sometimes it seems as though it’s me against the entire world.’
‘I will always be on your side.’ Archie leaned forward and briefly squeezed her hand. ‘But you won’t let me help you, because you are an infuriatingly independent female!’
Flora laughed. ‘Your reputation is appalling, Archie, and being seen with you will convince my doubters that I am a fallen woman.’
‘Nevertheless, allow me to take you to Beranger Court. Bring Polly with you. That will ensure that I remember my manners and preserve your reputation.’
‘Perhaps.’ Archie noticed that she hadn’t actually accepted his offer, but took comfort from the fact that she hadn’t turned it down either. ‘I had a less welcome visitor than Violet as well.’
Archie sat forward, not interrupting her as she described Conrad’s call in detail. He somehow managed not to ask why she hadn’t sent word to him, relieved that at least she had now raised the subject and that he hadn’t been obliged to resort to subterfuge in order to make her do so.
‘I am sorry you were inconvenienced,’ he said, ever the master of understatement. ‘Perhaps that is what has brought on your doubts about your living arrangements.’
‘Will would have got rid of him, I’m sure, had be refused to leave. Or else I would have set Zeus on him.’
Archie laughed. ‘The countess’s cat is as fierce as his late owner.’
‘Unquestionably. I made it very apparent that his presence was unwelcome, which appeared to confuse him. Clearly he thinks himself irresistible, but I was happy to disavow him of that conviction.’ She paused and fixed Archie with a pensive look. ‘What is he up to, Archie?’ she asked, frowning. ‘To be honest, his intensity frightens me. Not that I would ever permit my feelings to show, and they only exist because of his connection to my father. I mean, obviously he wouldn’t have called if that connection wasn’t there, but I find it very coincidental—far too coincidental—that his duties for Coutts just happened to bring him to our part of the world.’
Archie felt a little unmanned as he watched the gamut of emotions, the uncharacteristic uncertainties flitting across her face. She had never opened up to him quite so candidly before, and his desire to shoulder her burden was compelling. He had never felt his limitations more, acutely aware that he was incapable of offering her the protection she so deserved, physically at least. There were other ways. He thought longingly of the magnificent emerald and diamond ring, his own mother’s engagement ring, sitting in a drawer in this very room, waiting to be slid onto her finger where it belonged.
Were he to find the courage to ask for her hand, all her problems would be at an end and the protection of his name would ensure her safety. He sometimes thought that he invented excuses to avoid declaring himself, afraid of rejection. She was one of the few women in the entire land who would not be influenced by his position of privilege, wealth and consequence. She could have had Luke, if she’d been willing to make compromises, but she had stuck to her guns.
Not being a whole man held Archie back. She would find his scars as repellent as he himself did, but all the time he refrained from burning his bridges there was still hope for him.
He could dream. Dreams were all he had left.
‘They did not,’ he said into the ensuing silence.
She returned her cup to its saucer with a loud clatter. ‘Excuse me. What did not?’
‘Conrad’s duties did not bring him to the district. He was dismissed from his position at Coutts six months ago.’
‘Good heavens!’ Her eyebrows shot skywards. ‘How do you know? Are you sure?’
‘As I told you, our paths have crossed before and it didn’t end well. When you told me that he was intruding into your life I had Pawson make enquiries.’ Archie held his breath, expecting her to accuse him of meddling again. To his very great relief, she did not.
‘Why was he dismissed?’ She sat forward, watching him intently. ‘Do you know?’
‘Not as yet, but I shall find out. Someone in my circle will know, or will have heard rumours. Not that his position was as important as he makes it out to have been.’ Archie put his own cup aside and smiled at her. For some reason, the gesture caused her cheeks to turn a delightful shade of pink, giving him reason to suppose that she was not entirely indifferent to him. Giving him hope. ‘And we are fairly sure that he was only appointed to the position that he held in the first place because his father used his influence.’
‘How tiresome for you to think of standards being lowered by the wealthy middle classes.’
‘Whatever do you mean?’
‘Well, Coutts has a certain reputation for the refinement of its investors. Having a man who made his money producing steel calling the shots would not have sat well.’
Archie chuckled. ‘I have recovered from the shock—or I will, given time.’ His expression sobered. ‘We have also discovered that his father passed away about nine months ago, and Conrad’s dismissal came not long after that, which implies you are in the right of it and that he was tolerated in order to appease a valued customer.’
‘Conrad did not inherit?’
‘No. He has two elder brothers with whom he is not on speaking terms, and he received nothing under the terms of his father’s will. It all went to the elder two.’
‘Ah, I see.’ She frowned. ‘Well, actually I do not. How is he supporting himself if he has lost his position and has no inheritance to fall back on?’
