Page 83 of Corrupted Memories
“Yeah, you can see where my father’s thinking went.”
“He thought history was repeating itself,” Gianna says. She moves to crawl into my lap and I welcome her, sitting against the cushions as she settles her legs on the outside of mine. Her hands come up to cup my face and she kisses me softly. “I’m assuming he protected you.”
“Very publicly,” I add, squeezing her ass and moving her warm center closer to my hardening dick.
“So that’s three wives dead in eighteen years…” Gianna watches me thoughtfully. “But one was natural causes and the other two were done out of protection. This may be bad to say, but I don’t see the problem.”
I hum. “The thing about rumors is that they can spin out of control. Some people think he killed my mother to keep his heir uncontested. And no one knows what happened with my brother. They don’t know why he killed his other two wives because we refuse to let that information come to light.”
“And his current wife?” she asks.
Shrugging, I move my hand up her back and wrap it around the nape of her neck. “She’s a quiet little mouse. She doesn’t cause any trouble.”
Gianna kisses my lips when I pull her toward me. “Thank you for sharing that with me. I’m sure it was hard.” She pauses, biting the corner of her mouth. “Why did you think I would leave you over it?”
I stiffen, looking at her in confusion. “You have already threatened before that you will leave me if I can’t love you. Now you understand why I can’t.”
She pulls back, her eyebrows furrowing. “I don’t understand.”
I let go of her and run a tired hand down my face, sighing. “Love is poisonous. Look what it’s done tomy family, and look what happened to the only woman my father loved. She died having me.”
Gianna pushes off me to stand, watching me incredulously with an open mouth. “Sebastian…”
We stare at each other silently before she shakes her head and paces in front of the couch, her hands on her hips. My stomach drops as I take in her agitated state.
“Okay, walk me through this again,” she snaps, turning back to me and I tighten my jaw, not wanting to talk about it any longer.
“Your mom dies in childbirth, your brother’s mother was a fucking predator, your stepmother was a gold digger”—Gianna gives a mocking laugh—“and somehow this all has you believing that love is the problem.”
“Gianna—” I start, but she shushes me.
“What happened to your mother was a tragedy, okay? But I bet if you read what she wrote in that journal you swear isjust words on a paper, that’s the only example of love from these women.”
I swallow, my throat threatening to close as I think about the little, black leather bound book sitting in the bank.
“Your brother’s mother—” Gianna continues, shaking her head again. “That wasn’t love,Sebastian. That was a sick woman who took advantage of a child. What your father did, though, that’s the love you should focus on. The anger when he found out and how he reacted.”
I look up at her ceiling, unwilling to submit to the water gathering in my eyes.
“The way you felt like you failed at protecting him, that’s love. The way you guys let everyone think the worst of your father to protect your brother’s memory…” Her voice cracks, but I still can’t look at her.
“Gianna—” I try again, my voice barely above a whisper.
“The way your father didn’t hesitate to remove a second woman from your life. It’sterrifyingto love someone, but not for the reasons you think.”
Her hands cup my face and tilt my head to her. She looks as crushed as I feel, and my chest aches as I grab her wrists. “Stop,” I beg her.
She shakes her head, moving to sit back on my lap. “Sebastian, I won’t leave you, but I still stand by what I said. I won’t be in a loveless marriage.”
I exhale harshly, grinding my teeth, but she moves a hand over my mouth and smiles at me.
“But… I can be patient. I know you’ll get there one day. You won’t be afraid to tell me you love me. You won’t be afraid to tell our children you love them. I’m going to show you there’s nothing to fear about loving the right people.” She moves her hand and kisses me softly. “I’ll be patient because I’ve never loved someone the way I love you.”
My eyes flutter shut and I relax. “I promise to open my heart to the idea of loving you.”
A soft laugh fans across my face and when I look at her, she’s shaking her head. “And you think I live in denial.”
I pinch her side, moving her closer to me. “Move to London with me. Let’s start over, away from everything.”
