Page 23 of Mistletoe, Mayhem & Mr. Grump
"Very romantic," I assure him weakly.
"Wonderful! I tell everyone! The whole town will know about your romantic lunch!" He disappears again.
"The whole town already knows," I mutter.
"Iris works fast," Holden agrees.
My phone buzzes with a text from Delia.
Delia:Committee meeting. Twenty minutes. Bring the boyfriend.
"We've been summoned," I inform Holden, showing him the text.
"Already?" he asks.
"Delia doesn't waste time. She probably has a whole interrogation planned. There might even be a PowerPoint," I warn.
"About us?" he asks.
"About you. She definitely already has one about me. I've seen it. It's thirty-seven slides of disappointment with animations," I explain.
"Animations?" he raises an eyebrow.
"Slide transitions. Sound effects. The works. She's very thorough," I confirm.
"Should I be worried?" he asks.
"Terrified," I say cheerfully. "She made the last guy cry."
"The encyclopedia salesman?"
"No, he ran before the committee got to him. This was the guy before. Sold insurance. Good with numbers, bad with human emotions. Delia destroyed him with pie charts," I explain.
"Pie charts about what?" Holden asks, looking genuinely concerned now.
"His unsuitability. She had data. Spreadsheets. A color-coded matrix of his flaws," I say.
"She researched his flaws?" he asks.
"She researches everything. She probably knows your blood type by now," I warn.
"That's impressive and a bit terrifying," he admits.
"Welcome to Snowfall Creek," I say, standing up. "Ready to face the committee?"
"Do I have a choice?" he asks.
"You could run. The encyclopedia salesman established a precedent," I offer.
"And leave you to face them alone?" He stands, offering me his hand. "What kind of fake boyfriend would I be?"
"A smart one?" I suggest, but I take his hand, anyway.
We head toward the door, but Giuseppe blocks our path. "Wait! You must kiss! For luck!"
"What?" we both say.
"All couples kiss after a romantic lunch! It's tradition!" Giuseppe insists.
