Page 41 of Sins or Secrets
“You guys never came back over the years.Your father just literally uprooted and left.What the hell did Lilly do to make him cut her off like that?”
I look away because I know the answer to that.It was the start of everything.Lilly was the only person I told I was pregnant and she helped me hide my secret from my father the same way she helped me hide the fact that Logan and I were in a secret relationship.
Dad blamed her for everything.I think he could have moved past the latter if the former hadn’t happened, and of course, he had big plans for me with Riley.Plans that Lilly knew about but never told me.The last thing she said to Dad that night was she was disgusted with him.Disgusted that he thought marrying me off to some guy I didn’t know for money was right.
“They had a big argument,” I decide to say.
“Must have been one hell of an argument.”
“It was.” But not bigger than the one I had with my father where he ended it with the threat of making Logan disappear.
I’ll never forget those piercing words.Words that cut deep into my soul and shattered me from the inside out.Then Dad used the same vile tone and sneer when we found out I’d lost my baby.
The evil bastard he was had the audacity to tell me it was for the best.
“For what it’s worth, she died peacefully and painlessly.I even think she had a smile on her face.” Logan’s voice interrupts my thoughts and I turn back to face him.
“You were there?”
“Yeah. She wanted me to read that poem she liked.”
“In Memoriam.” It was read at the funeral.
“Yeah. You know she loved that poem and my uncle indulged her.That day she was just sitting there, propped up on her pillows listening.Before I got to the last verse I sensed something had changed and as I looked up her eyes were closed.I knew she was gone, but she somehow looked younger.There was a light about her that I remember from when my uncle was alive.It came back.”
I didn’t realize I was crying until the splash of a tear dropped on to my lap.More tears stream down my cheeks and I wipe them away quickly.
Logan hands me a tissue and I dab at my eyes then I’m surprised to feel the warmth of his hand cover mine briefly for a gentle squeeze when I rest my hand in my lap.
“I think she did understand why you couldn’t be there.If not she would have told me so, and you know what I’m like.I wouldn’t have hesitated to tell you.It sounds like the truth was kept from you for various reasons.”
“It was. My life wasn’t what the papers made it out to be.It was far from it.”
Logan holds my gaze for a few moments and seems as deep in thought as he was a little while ago.Heonly looks away when we approach a large pick up and he has to focus on the road again.
The silence returns as we proceed on our journey.It’s not long though until we venture down the road that takes us straight to Lilly’s house.
The first thing that comes into view is the beautiful grounds surrounded by Greenfield lake.We used to have such a crazy time on the water in the boats with all our friends, and together.
Even when we were supposed to be the typical childhood enemies, we could call a truce to have fun.Our days in the summer saw us either on that lake or exploring the length of the Cape Fear River right through to Wrightsville Beach.
Everything happened between me and Logan on these grounds.They were big enough to explore and big enough to hide from my father.
The endless expanse of the lush green grass and surrounding trees is breathtaking.But what is more stunning is the grand stately home my aunt once lived in, that we christened the lake house.
However, before we even pull up the drive, my heart sinks when I see the damage done by the hurricane to the left side of the house.
The roof has caved in and the entire area where there was a sunroom and pool is covered in debris like there was a bomb blast.
The devastation reminds me of one of the thousand scenes from post apocalypse films where everything is in ruins.
Logan and I get out of the car and look around,both of us taking in the disaster of what was once a work of art for the way my aunt took care of the place and the magic she created from her love for it.
Logan walks up to the porch and I follow.
He moves to the door, pulls out a set of keys and opens it.Although the door creaks, it swings open and I’m glad it doesn’t fall off its hinges.
“Well at least the door works,” he states.“And inside here doesn’t look too bad.”
