Page 66 of To Belong Together
Now, the one positive of her being by the bar was that he had a great view of her legs. Not that he was staring.
He rubbed his forehead and reined in his thoughts. His feelings for her ran so much deeper than appearances. She was strong and caring, independent, and not easily impressed by externals.
Mark returned from handing Ava off to her grandma. “You might’ve dodged a bullet on the wedding party thing.”
“Did I?”
Mark propped his elbows on the table, his hands clasped near his face, a casual shield against eavesdroppers. “Megan was disappointed she wouldn’t be walking down the aisle with you. I’m pretty sure she was naming your babies.”
“They already have names.”
Mark’s eyebrows lifted.
“Trigger and Camo.”
Mark snorted. “Come on. You’re great with Ava. Someday …”
Maybe.
His line of sight followed Erin as she, his sisters, and Tanner made their way to the table. Between her blue hair and his line of work, if he and Erin had a son, he’d probably sport a mohawk as soon as he grew the hair for it.
When had he developed such a wild imagination?
John got to his feet and pulled out her chair, wishing his thoughts had been more grounded in reality so he’d have something to say to her. A meaningful comment. Something to transform this into the date it wasn’t.
But he wasn’t a good conversationalist in the best of circumstances. With his recent panic attack, his feelings for Erin, and the time for his speech nearing, it was a wonder he could even think. He settled for tucking her seat in behind her, propping his casted hand on the back of her chair, and letting his fingers rest against her shoulder. Any question he had about whether the contact would be welcome was answered when she brushed her fingers over his.
Down the table, Mom was telling a story, fully animated.
His stepdad offered a slight smile in John’s direction, even the small signal packed with steadier kindness than he would’ve received from his biological father. This was his family. Erin had spoken of feeling a sense of belonging with her father, and though he, Stacy, and Kate had been on better terms, he did have solid relationships with the rest of his family—Mark, Angie, his parents, and his grandma. Yet remnants of the panic attack left him feeling as though he were on the mend from the flu. When his turn to speak came, could he keep steady, not crack with extra emotion?
Mark emceed, introducing the best man and maid of honor’s toasts. Afterward, one of Tanner’s sisters and Angie gave short remarks before Mark looked to John.
“We have one last toast before we eat. John, Kate’s brother.”
John’s heart knocked on his ribs like an overbearing guest. This was only a shadow of what he’d experienced on the highway, but what if it worsened? He stood, pacing his breath.
Kate looked at him, eyes wide. Had she forgotten this was part of the plan?
It might be better if it weren’t. His heart took up space his lungs needed. He was risking a second panic attack for this, and talking had estranged him from family in the past. He took the folded paper from the pocket of his button-down shirt, a page from the book, photocopied.
Awestruck performances no longer made him nervous. He knew his part, knew the value of his contribution. The few people who disagreed had no power over him. But he’d already been replaced in the bridal party, and if his sisters thought less of him, he’d miss out on something more vital than record sales or the next contract.
He glanced over the page one last time, and his raspy inhale told him what he wanted to deny.
He couldn’t do it.
Stalling, he took a measured breath. “I’m not known for my speeches.”
That earned him some chuckles and, from Erin, a sweet smile. Two tables away, a teenager pointed a phone toward him. This was probably streaming live, cast and heart out for all to see.
“So, to paraphrase from a beloved book from Kate’s childhood,Tales from Fairhill Castle…” John lay down the paper and lifted his glass, spotting another raised phone as he did. “Tanner, you have found your lady, and Kate, your knight. When you face overwhelming obstacles, may you lend each other strength. To enduring love and your happiness.”
Around the table, glasses clinked as most couples exchanged smiles.
The groom-to-be watched as if he expected another shoe to drop.
Kate’s face flushed.
