Page 93 of The Marriage Narrative
“I can’t. I have to stay.”
Jordan smiled and kissed her cheek. “Okay.”
She stood on the sidewalk watching part of her heart drive away until Grace yelled at her to come inside from the window. “I spent all day cooking for you! Get in this house and come eat!”
Once upon atime, many years ago, the backyard had been the biggest selling point for the townhouse.
Zinnia had missed the feel of the worn, soft wood under her bare feet and the unique, subtly fresh scent of their clover lawn. They’d spent countless evenings out there having dinner by sunset. And even more early mornings, nursing water bottles and savoring the crisp air after long nights of partying before sleep took over. They had hosted swanky friend brunches and all kinds of themed parties, everything from birthdays to epic wallow sessions.
This rented townhouse was home. They lived in and loved every square inch of it.
Zinnia groaned as she took her first bite of Grace’s cooking. “I’ve been dreaming about this since I left.”
“And now you can have it whenever you want.” Fiona stole some chips off her plate and then launched into what Zinnia had missed. Everything from the Battle of Sidewalk Parking starring their still-feuding neighbors to the Great HOA Revolt.
Grace took point on everything to do with their friend circle and added in some of her family gossip. Apparently shit had finally hit the fan between her twin sister and the best friend she’d been in love with for like ten years.
These reveals, mixed with the comment about the animal shelter pictures, didn’t sit right with Zinnia. “Why didn’t you tell me any of this before now?”
“Because we didn’t want to stress you out. You needed to stay focused,” Grace said.
To be fair, she hadn’t asked either. She’d needed them, but was also trying to give them space to figure out the parts of their life that wouldn’t necessarily include her.
Maybe she went about it the wrong way. Slowly losing touch, one unsent text message at a time, wasnotgoing to be their future.
“If anything, we were waiting around for your updates,” Fiona said kindly. “If it was something big,we obviously would’ve told you.”
“So,nothingsuper important happened? At all? Maybe something you were waiting to tell me to my face.” She eyed Grace, who knew that she knew, but it was Fiona who innocently asked, “Like what?”
And not the good kind of innocent where they were GUILTY. The bad kind that meant her best friends were still idling at love square one. She’d left them alone formonths! Andnothing?
What the fuck.
Grace shrugged. “Making sure you survived that damn show was a group effort. We knew you weren’t leaving without him, and we’d never abandon you. So.Quartet.”
Zinnia loved being with Jordan, but the energy she got from being with her girls just hit different. They made her feel invincible—a shot of adrenaline, dopamine, and the best drugs money could buy all rolled into two of the greatest people she’d been blessed to know.
Sometimes, she really couldn’t figure out what they saw in her. She wasn’t as smart as them. Wasn’t nearly as business savvy. Worrying about being too much, asking for too much, lived with her like a curse.
She tried to make up for everything she lacked by being present, never forgetting a birthday or a promotion, watching out for them, supporting them, doing chores and errands that they’d never notice. Just all the little things that she could possibly think of that hopefully added up to enough.
“I like him,” Fiona whispered. “So does she.”
“I can hear you.”
“And now we’ll finally have the chance to get tolovehim,” Fiona said with a laugh. “I’m really happy you’re home now.”
“It’s not over yet,” Zinnia warned. “We still have to finish shooting the season. I’d like to be paid for all my pain and suffering, not sued for breach of contract.”
Hours later, Zinniacrawled into bed, phone already in her hands and ready to be propped in front of her face. Jordan answered in the same position—his sheets and pillows clearly in view with a very clingy Beta Carotene snuggled around his chest.
“Miss me?”
Yes. Desperately. More than anything. “No, actually. I just remembered that I forgot my jacket in your car.”
“Oh no, not your jacket.” He grinned.
“It’s my favorite. I think about it all the time. Especially right before bed.”
