Page 106 of Santa Has a Six-Pack
Hours later, we lie beside the Christmas tree, wrapped up in each other’s arms, delightfully spent after who-knows-how-many rounds of the best sex I’ve ever had.
I had no idea sex could be this fun.
I had no clue that I could feel so connected to the person I’m with.
So happy.
So free.
My head rests on the space between his shoulder and his neck. My hand rests on his chiseled chest. I’m counting the steady beat of his heart, feeling completely content for the first time in… maybe forever.
“Matt?” I whisper. “Are you awake?”
When he doesn’t answer, I prop myself up on an elbow and watch him sleep.
A flood of emotions fills my chest as I watch his rise and fall.
One look at his peaceful, beautiful face, and I know I’m a goner.
How on earth did this happen?
At what point did the silly guy dressed in spandex rapping about exercise become the guy I can’t stop thinking about? The guy I trust more than anyone else? The man I can’t live without?
Correction: I can live without him.
I’m just realizing now that I don’t want to.
If my early life as a dancer taught me anything, it’s the power of rehearsal. Day in and day out, dancers practice their steps so that when the curtain finally rises for the big show, what once felt awkward in their bodies feels completely natural.
I don’t have a lot of experience expressing my emotions.
For most of my life, I’ve kept them coiled tight in my body, with no safe place for them to land.
But something tells me I can be different with Matt.
With Matt, maybe I can finally land.
So I practice opening my heart to him while he sleeps.
“Matt?” I whisper. “I think I’m in love with you.”
Chapter 28
Matt
“What do you think?” I ask Penny as we walk toward my mom’s building. “Are they ready?”
It’s officially one week until Christmas, and we just had our final rehearsal for the kids’ holiday show.
“Hell yeah, they are! Those kids are going to kill it on Sunday!” She pauses. “Wait. They’re gonna slay it. That’s their favorite word these days, right?”
“One of them. That and skibidi.”
“Ooh, I don’t like that one.” Her nose scrunches.
I laugh. “No one likes that one. No one over the age of ten, that is.”
“Seriously, Matt.” She interlaces her fingers with mine. “The run-through was awesome. It’s funny, it’s sweet. It’s weird as hell… It’s very you.”
