Page 52 of Sharkbait
He‘s not wrong.
“Fine. So the night we... boinked, I couldn’t shut the hell up.”
“Dirty talk?”
“Not exactly.”
“So what were you talking about? The weather?”
I sigh. “I busted out a weird impromptu monologue comparing her to coffee grinds.”
“Excuse me?”
“I said she was a strong, concentrated woman who won’t be diluted with water for other people’s comfort.”
“That makes absolutely no sense.”
I frown. “Come on. It makes a little bit of sense, doesn’t it?”
“No, it does not.”
“Fine. I didn’t even stop there, though. I also told her she was slowly pouring over me and effortlessly spiking the temps in my refrigerator. Oh, and I gave her the nickname Cold Brew.”
“Damn, you hit that metaphor hard. And FYI? Cold Brew is a terrible nickname. Especially for someone you hope to sleep with again.“
“I know, I know.” I dig my toes into the sand.
“Well, this is what you get when you don’t date for six years, friend. You’ve got no game.”
I do some quick math. “Seven years. I haven’t dated in seven years. And I’ve got game, ya jerk. It’s just... rusty.”
Iris and Eva gather our buckets and shovels and start making their way over to the umbrella.
Seven years.
From the moment I learned Eva was pregnant, everything changed. I quit women. I quit drinking. And I placed my entire focus on them.
Seems like a lifetime ago and also the blink of an eye.
“So how’s the visit going?” Wally asks. You making progress with The Highs and Lows?”
I’m halfway through my once-a-month trip back to Hawaii to spend time with my daughter and get things squared away for the new excursion company.
“It’s going great. Business-wise, everything is on track for launching in January. And Rissy-wise...” I sigh. “One week is never enough.”
Iris plops her sandy butt in my lap and whips her wet hair in my face. I make a big production of sputtering and spitting the strands out of my mouth. She laughs. “Who are you talking to, Daddy?”
“It’s Uncle Wally. Want to say hi?”
She nods vigorously.
I put him on speaker.
“Say hi, Uncle Wally.”
“Hi, Uncle Wally!” Iris squeals.
“Hey, Rissy Roo!” he says. “We miss you in these parts.”
