Page 112 of Lovebug
“Sure...” I stretch out the word, hoping to stretch out more of an explanation from him.
“But also... I wasn’t always very…”He considers his words before continuing. “I was kind of a… You’ve heard that phrase ‘like talking to a brick wall,’ yeah?”
“Yeah…”
“Well... that. I was pretty immovable in most areas of my life. Business? Definitely. Relationships? Absolutely.”
“What changed?”
“What makes you think something changed?” He sort of half laughs.
“Look at you now. You’re the total opposite of ‘The Wall.’ You’re kind. You’re generous. You care about other people. All other people.”
“Ugh. Don’t let that get around,” he jokes.
“You singlehandedly rescued a room of fifty strangers from imminent bankruptcy—still not clear on how or why you did that—but, it’s pretty clear you’re not the mysterious curmudgeon you wanted people to think you were. Seems like ‘The Wall’ tumbled down somewhere along the line, and you’ve been figuring out how to pick up the pieces.”
He’s quiet for a moment. For a guy who just proclaimed to be an open book, he certainly seems reticent around this particular topic.
I push just a little bit more.
“Before, um, Dawn, the splooge lady, said you were recovering? What was that all about?”
“You can hold the splooge,” he says.
“Excuse me?” My voice rockets to an interesting pitch. I try again in a lower tone. “I mean… excuse me?”
He laughs. “You don’t need to call her ‘the splooge lady.’ I’ll know who you’re talking about if you just call her Dawn.”
“Oh, okay,” I breathe. “Good to know.”
He continues, “To answer your question, though... yeah. Two years ago, I got the kind of diagnosis no one wants to get.I was working this high-level finance job, making a ton of money, but making absolutely no authentic connections or relationships. I thought what I had with my ex was real. But it turns out… nah. When I got sick, she wasn’t too interested in sticking by me. She was even less interested when I quit the job and the paycheck she found so attractive. I made a pact between myself and…” His voice drifts off, and he shakes his head a little bit.
“A pact between you and who? What were you going to say?” I encourage. I wasn’t aware this guy needed encouragement. He always seems so completely confident in everything he says and does.
“I don’t wanna weird you out with my woo,” he says.
“Your ‘woo’?” I laugh.
“Yeah, I’ve been told in recent months I’ve become a ‘spiritual woo-woo.’ I don’t think that’s entirely accurate, though.” He pauses for a breath before continuing. “ What, um, what word are you comfortable with: The Big G? The Expansive U? Universal E?”
“I… have no idea what you’re talking about,” I say apologetically.
“God, Universe, Energy,” he rattles off. “I’m more of a Universe kind of guy. Or nature really. It’s all the same thing, isn’t it? No matter what you call it?”
“I guess?”
Wow, whoisthis guy?
“Anyway, when I got better, I knew I was one of the lucky ones. I was getting a second chance. I made a pact between me and nature that I would turn things around and get back to the basics. That’s where the real magic in life is, ya know? The basics. I wasn’t sure what exactly I should be doing next, but my gut told me the first step needed to be stripping away all pretense. All busy-ness. All ego. All desire to please. Feeling free again was the goal. And when I thought about the last time I truly felt free, it was when I was a kid and spent my winter breaks on my grandparent’s tree farm in Minnesota. When I was there, I felt like I was in a constant conversation with nature. I’d spend my days climbing oak trees, feeling their sturdy energy lifting me up. I’d run in and out of the evergreen trees, breathing in that pine needle scent, feeling like it was speaking to me. That’s where I first learned to tap too.”
“You’re a tap dancer?” I squeak.
“Haha, no. My grandpa taught me to taptreesfor syrup.”
“Right, right. Of course.”
“So when I saw Naomi Thornton at a fundraiser, and she told me the arboretum was up for sale, it seemed like the perfect next step to take.” He takes in the puzzled look on my face and explains, “She and I are on the board of the same charity.”
