Page 106 of Flirtasaurus
“Coming!”
I turn to Ralph, who is now frozen. “Dude, just go in the bathroom and get yourself decent. I’ll head out there with my dad to look at the car, and you can join us when you’re ready. Cool?”
“Yeah, cool,” he says.
“Turn around, please?”
“Why?” he questions, but he turns around anyway. Such a team player.
I take one more nibble of his butt, “Rrrrrah. So yummy,” and then head to get the door.
I hear Ralph laughing on his way to the bathroom. Once I confirm he is safely out of view, I open the door to my smiling, silent dad.
“Hey,” I say with no small amount of guilt lacing the word.
“Eh, stop it.”
“Stop what?”
“You’re being mopey.”
“I feel bad about last night.”
“Well, you should!”
“I do!”
“You should! You were quite a little shit to your mother.”
“I know!”
“So you better be working up one hell of an apology is all I’m saying.”
“I am!”
“Good! Now let’s drop it so I can fix up that clunker your boyfriend calls a car.”
“Dad, he’s not my—”
“Calliope? I wasn’t born yesterday. And I’ve seen you with fellas before. This one’s different. I’m happy for ya, kid.”
“Thanks, Dad.”
Wow. He’s being genuine. Not a joke in sight. I’m not sure either of us knows how to proceed in this manner. We both start to fidget. He breaks the tension.
“Alrighty then. You got the key?”
I run and grab it from Ralph’s nightstand.
“I do now.”
“Great.”
We step out into the parking lot and shut the door behind us.
“It’s that Vulva there on the left.” I point.
“The what now, who now?”
