Page 65 of Sinbound to the Highlander
“Aye,” she confirmed.
“Ye ken, we’re nae that far away,” Lady Grace said, while reaching for Freya’s hand. “If ye want, we can turn back.”
A quick look out the window told Freya that they were halfway there, so she shook her head, “Nay, nay, I’ll be all right. I’m going back for Yuletide anyway. ‘Tis only a few weeks till then. I want to spend this time with ye. It’s only fair.”
“Then we’ll talk about yer wedding,” Elspeth exclaimed while clapping her hands. “Tell me again about the dress ye want to wear? We can have two made because I want to be with ye on the day.”
“That’s so precious, that ye two would like to look the same,” Lady Grace put in. “I will call the seamstress and have her take yer measurements.”
“Light-green silk,” Elspeth exclaimed, “That’s the best for us.”
“I’d rather cotton,” Freya contradicted. “I still daenae feel that comfortable in silk…or velvet.”
Elspeth pouted but did not shut off as they made plans for the wedding. The flowery conversation continued until they reached the Milleson’s castle and all but ran in through the heavy snow.
“All right,” Laird Aidan called while brushing snow off his shoulder. “Warm bath for all of us. I won’t risk the chance of us getting ill.”
Hugging her mother, Freya went off to her room, still bogged down by the fact that she had hurt Evan. She never wanted to see that agony in his eyes again and vowed to apologize wholeheartedly the moment she saw him again. She did not have to wait long for the servants to fill her tub, and she bathed in solemn silence.
Though the marks had faded, Freya traced her fingers over the kiss marks Evan had left during their joining. A soft shiver ran through her when she remembered the possessive glimmer in his eyes while looking down on her, and the slickness of his skin as he moved within her. Most of all, experiencing an intense pleasure that had shattered her to pieces, making sparks of white erupt behind her eyes, and floating back into a sea of warm numbness that came after.
Her body felt heavy when she stepped out of the tub, and she dressed in a thick brown dress and hose to keep the cold from her feet. After sending for some warm milk, she perched on a large padded chair by the window and looked out.
I feel so guilty, Evan, forgive me, please.
A knock on her door alerted her to a person coming in, but instead of a servant bearing her cup of milk, it was Elspeth. She looked freshly bathed and dressed too and was bearing two cups. She rested one before Freya and smiled, “We ken too much alike. I also sent for a cup of milk.”
Curling up in a seat near Freya, Elspeth took a sip of her milk then asked, “I dinnae want to ask with Maither and Faither near us, but that night after yer engagement announcement, ye went missin’. Were ye with Laird Ruthven then?”
“Aye, I was,” Freya smiled.
Elspeth leaned in, and her eyes were mischievous. It was a sudden and unexpected shift from the calm, dismissive air Elspeth usually took on. Her voice dipped to a whisper, “Did ye share his bed?”
Taken aback by the straightforward question, Freya wondered why Elspeth would want to know this. “Erm…aye, I did, but why…”
Elspeth’s high squeal cut Freya’s words off, and she winced at the piercing sound. When Elspeth went quiet, she finished her question, “Why would ye want to ken this?”
“Oh, please,” Elspeth rolled her eyes. “Ye need someone to confide in, aye, and I doubt ye would tell this to Maither. I’m right here. Who’s best to keep yer secrets than yer sister?”
It felt strange, but Freya allowed Elspeth to tease tidbits out of loving moments with Evan out of her, and in her mind, she relieved that magical night, when they had coupled, all over again. She kept the most profound secrets to herself like their first kiss and how it felt to rest in his arms, but let Elspeth know a few things. “He’s so passionate and caring.”
A wistful look crossed Elspeth’s face, and her fingers curled around the cup. “Ye truly love him, daenae ye?”
“I do,” Freya smiled into her cooling milk. “Which is why I want to apologize to him when I see him again.”
Elspeth’s brow quirked up, “Apologize? For what?”
After considering her words, Freya stopped herself from admitting that she and Evan’s disagreement had come from discussing Elspeth, “Naything for ye to worry yerself about.”
Profound disappointment showed on Elspeth’s face, but she masked it with a smile, “So about the wedding dress…”
Though they had already discussed this, Freya allowed Elspeth to dive right back into the wedding dress discussion. When the call for supper came, she requested light portions to be sent to her room as tiredness was tugging at her mind.
When the stew and bread came, she ate but sat up for a while reading the book she had carried from Evan’s home before going to bed. To get more comfortable, she tugged the hairpin Evan gifted to her out of her hair, and after rubbing her fingers over the smooth stones, let it rest on the nightstand.
Her rest was fitful, as worry for Evan still rested on her mind, and woke her in the middle of the night. Instinctively, she reached for the hairpin Evan had given her where she had rested it on her nightstand but felt it gone. Perhaps it had dropped off the table.
She made to stand, but a sudden fit of dizziness took her, and she pressed a hand to her head. Freya moved off again, but her stomach lurched, and she could not see straight. Maybe it was best to go back to sleep and search for it tomorrow.
