Page 65 of As the Earl Likes
Sheff accepted his hat from his valet and made his way out of the Albany, where he lived, and caught a hack to the Siren’s Call. He hoped Jo would have time to speak with him.
He entered the common room and immediately saw her standing at a table chatting with the occupants—three gentlemen Sheff knew somewhat. As he watched her laugh and smile, his chest pulled. He was going to miss her.
Becky approached him with a smile. “Evening, Sheff. I’ll grab your ale.”
“Thank you,” he said absentmindedly, his focus still on Jo. When what Becky had said actually permeated his brain, he touched her arm before she could walk away. “No. Could you tell Jo to go to the supply cupboard or whatever you call it?”
She gave him a puzzled look. “Why?”
“Because I want to speak with her privately.” He flashed a brief, closed-lipped smile.
“I will,” Becky said, taking herself off as Sheff made his way to the cupboard.
Only one of the lanterns was burning when he stepped inside. He moved away from the door and surveyed the shelves as he waited for Jo.
A moment later, the door swung open, and she came inside. “Becky said you were here.”
He turned to face her, and the truth smacked him in the face more surely than any pugilist. He was falling in love with her. He’d no idea what that meant until now. And he still had no idea if it would last. But in this moment, he felt incredibly strong emotion for her.
“I needed to see you,” he said, his voice sounding rough. He coughed. “I’m going to leave London tomorrow.”
She’d closed the door and now stood in front of it. Her brow pleated as she tucked a loose curl behind her ear. “Is that wise?”
“It seems the best option, particularly given your argument on why we shouldn’t just dissolve the betrothal right now.” It occurred to Sheff that he could force her hand. He had only to do something scandalous to provoke her to cry off.
“I won’t give your mother the satisfaction,” she said with a defiance that only made him fall harder for her. “Are you leaving town now in order to accelerate the end of this scheme? Do you plan to cause a scandal wherever it is that you’re going?”
“Not immediately. I am following our original plan.”
“The plan does not involve you leaving town mid-Season. People will question the betrothal if you leave. They may presume you have regrets.”
“I certainly regret proposing this ridiculous scheme.” He went to brush his hand through his hair only to meet his hat. Taking it off, he set it on the table. “I’m going to tell my mother that I’m visiting Bane—Banemore—to support him in his grief.”
“I know who Bane is,” Jo said softly. “Will you really do that? I know you two are close friends. He would likely appreciate your company. At least, I think he would, but I don’t know him as well as I have come to know you.”
He hoped not. When he thought of how close they’d grown, of their shared attraction, their kisses, he didn’t want to imagine her with any other man.
“Actually, I hadn’t thought to actually visit him. He hasn’t replied to my letters. I’m not sure he wants a visitor.”
“Want and need aren’t the same thing.”
They felt that way when he considered Jo. He wanted and needed her most desperately. “Perhaps I will travel north to see him.” He had plenty of time to do that and make it to Weston before August when he would meet with his friends for their annual frolic.
Why did that not hold the same allure as in years past? Hell, he’d fallen squarely into the trap he’d feared. He was in love, and he wanted to spend time with the woman who’d stolen his heart instead of his closest friends.
Wasn’t she his close friend?
Perhaps that was the emotion he was feeling—the love and camaraderie one felt for a dear friend. Except he didn’t want to shag his other friends. Just Jo.
He could try to find excuses for the way he felt, or attempt to explain it away, but there was no denying the truth of things. There was also no point in accepting it or pursuing it. He was alone in his feelings, and he would remain that way.
“You’re leaving tomorrow, then?” she asked, her gaze meeting his almost tentatively.
He nodded. “I plan to speak with my mother first. I will give her strict instructions to leave you alone. Any communication she wants to have with you must be with Min present. I will demand she not expect anything from you. No Society engagements. No leaving your job.”
Frowning, Jo put her hand on her hip. “I have clothes that you’ve paid for that I haven’t even worn.”
“Consider them payment for the extra harassment you’ve endured.” He blew out a breath. “I can’t believe I was foolish enough to think this would work. Instead of relief, I’ve invited a whole new campaign of disappointment from my mother.”
