Page 92 of Irresistible
“He insisted.” Da moved into the study so that Robbie could come in too. He embraced Dougal.
“Thank you,” Dougal whispered to his cousin before they broke apart. Turning to his father, he asked, “Why did you come all this way? I was planning on leaving tomorrow.”
Da waved his hand. “I was impatient. Besides, I haven’t been to London in ages, and I wanted to come at least once more, if only to see how you’ve been taking care of the house.” He looked around at what was really his study. “It looks good on you. And now you can show Robbie around.”
Dougal couldn’t deny the appeal in that. “What about your apprenticeship?”
“Och, Johnson understood. Dinna fash yerself. I’m here as long as ye need me.”
Glad to have them both here, Dougal started toward the door. “I’ll ask Henderson to prepare your rooms.”
“I’ve already done that.” Da ambled to what had always been his favorite chair when he’d come to London and sat down with a huff. “Pour us some whisky.”
“None for me,” Robbie said. “I’m going to let the two of ye talk.”
Dougal poured three glasses anyway and handed one to his cousin. “Take it with you at least.”
Robbie grinned. “Twist my arm. See you later.” He left the study, closing the door behind him.
Dougal delivered another tumbler of whisky to his father’s hand. Da gave him the walking stick in exchange, and Dougal stood it against the side of the chair.
Plucking up his own glass, and sitting opposite his father, Dougal smiled. “I rarely sit in that chair.”
“Why not?” Da sipped his whisky and closed his eyes in silent appreciation.
“It’s silly, but I like to sit here and imagine you’re in that chair. Then we have a conversation.” Dougal had never shared that with anyone. Why would he?
“What do I say?”
Dougal laughed. “Not much, unfortunately.”
“Well, it’s good to know you miss me as much as I miss you. Sometimes I’ve wondered.”
“Have you?” Dougal found that surprising. He wrote often.
“There’s been something different about you since you left the Black Watch. I would have thought you would spend more time at home. In Scotland, I mean.”
Da, of course, didn’t know that Dougal had been a spy. Dougal had only ever said that he’d departed the Black Watch to complete an assignment for the Foreign Office. He hadn’t ever mentioned ongoing employment or the nature of that assignment. Thankfully, Da hadn’t questioned anything. Until now.
“What do you mean by different?” Dougal asked, feeling slightly uneasy.
“I would ask where my son has been hiding.” He leaned forward, his features creased with grave concern. “Did something happen during the war? Did it damage you in some way?”
“No.” Dougal could think of plenty of men who had been damaged, especially Max.
“Then why didn’t you come home more? And don’t give me that nonsense about traveling.”
Lies sprang to Dougal’s tongue, but he didn’t say any of them. Since he was done with the Foreign Office, there was no harm in telling his father—who wouldn’t be on this earth much longer—the truth. Indeed, he suddenly regretted not telling him sooner, especially since he’d revealed his secret to Robbie. “I continued to work for the Foreign Office. I couldn’t tell you.” He gave his father an extremely sheepish and hopefully apologetic stare.
“Ah.” Da sat back and was quiet for a moment. “I imagine you were very helpful to them. I’m proud of you, son.”
Emotion clogged Dougal’s throat. He worked to swallow past it. “Thank you. That means everything to me.”
“I’m glad to hear it. Will you continue to do so now?”
“No. I’ve left my post.” Dougal kept his voice even. He didn’t want his father bearing any guilt for the end of his career.
Da grimaced anyway. “I would ask if that bothers you, but I’m certain it does. You have never done anything halfway.” He regarded Dougal with pride and admiration. “You’ve always worked harder than anyone. I know you felt you had to because of how you look and your paternity, that you felt the need to prove you belonged. I hope you know that none of it was necessary to earn my love. You had that the moment you entered this world. I promised to raise you as my own, and it has been my great honor to do so.”
