Page 94 of Impassioned
Constantine had watched her as she spoke, but now he sent a suspicious glance toward the physician. “What sort of pains?”
“The sort that normally accompany a woman who is likely with child. I’m fine. Dr. Montbourne is lovely. And since he will return at a later time to check my progress, you should apologize.”
He stared at her, frozen for a long moment, so she squeezed his hand again and whispered his name. At last, he blinked and turned to face Dr. Montbourne.
“I apologize for my outburst. I require documentation of your education, your age, and how long you have practiced in your profession, and a list of no fewer than five—no, ten—references who can attest to your knowledge and expertise. References with medical backgrounds, from the Royal College and the like, not your neighbor or your mother.”
He sounded so very cross but also concerned, and Sabrina wanted to ease all of his pain.
Dr. Montbourne inclined his head. “I would be pleased to provide this information, my lord.”
“At the earliest opportunity,” Constantine practically growled.
Sabrina let go of Constantine’s hand. “I’ll see you out, Dr. Montbourne.” She led him from her bedchamber into the sitting room where Charity stood, her eyes wide.
“You may go, Charity,” she said with a smile before turning to Dr. Montbourne.
“Please accept my deepest apologies for my husband’s behavior. He lost his mother due to the care of an inept surgeon, and I’m afraid he has a grave distrust for medical practitioners.”
“That is understandable. I shall do my best to alleviate his concerns.” He took her hand and bowed. “Take good care, my lady. I’ll see you soon.”
“Thank you, Dr. Montbourne.” She watched him depart the sitting room, then turned to see her husband standing in the doorway wearing an extremely disgruntled expression.
“You shouldn’t tell him my personal history. It’s none of his business.”
Sabrina longed to smooth the worry from his forehead and from his very soul. “Why not, if it helps him understand his patients—you and me—better.”
Constantine grunted. “He is notmyphysician. Nor is he yours yet.”
She took a step toward him. “My dear Constantine, you must be willing to share things, to open up about your emotions—your fears and desires—if you want to get on in this life. I have only recently learned this lesson myself.”
He ran his hand through his hair, exhaling. “That’s why I’m here, actually.” He started forward but stopped a few feet away, his gaze dropping to her belly. “Is it really true? That you’re with child?”
She nodded, tears pricking the backs of her eyes and clogging her throat. “It seems so. My courses are extremely regular, and they are quite late. When I described my symptoms to Dr. Montbourne, he did a brief examination, and he believes that I am carrying. We will know for certain, of course, in the coming weeks.” Was he happy? Shocked? Terrified?
“I can hardly believe it,” he whispered. “What if something goes wrong?” His gaze lifted to hers, and she realized hewasterrified.
“We will face it together,” she said. “I hope so anyway.”
He blinked, his features opening as if he’d just remembered something vitally important. “Yes, together. I don’t want to do anything without you. I thought I could go back to the way things were, that I preferred that—I think I even convinced myself that you wanted that too. But you came here looking for a change, determined to be someone different.” He shook his head, a faint smile teasing his lips. “Not someone different, butyou.”
How had he come to understand her so perfectly? “Exactly.I’ve been who everyone wanted or expected me to be.”
“Including me. I assumed you loathed me because you didn’t want to marry me. I didn’t give you a chance. I didn’t giveusa chance.”
“And I assumed you would be autocratic and cold like your father.”
“Haven’t I been?” Constantine arched a sandy brow, and the effect of his self-deprecation and sly humor was devastating.
Sabrina rushed forward and clasped his hand between hers. “Yes, but that’s not who you are.”
“No, it’s not. I didn’t know who I was until you came to London to save me from myself. I know that was not your intent—you wanted a child—but that’s what happened.”
“Yes, I wanted a child, but I wanted you too.”
He narrowed one eye at her. “I think it’s important that we’re completely honest with each other, that there are no more assumptions or half-truths or misunderstandings.”
Heat rose up Sabrina’s neck. “All right, perhaps at first I was fixated on a child. But as soon as I learned about the pleasurable side of marriage, I wanted that. With you. Wanting you came very quickly—and easily. Even that first night when things were still so awkward between us, I wanted you. I just didn’t know how to show it, and I was too afraid to say it.”
