Page 85 of So Right
He stepped closer, and she resisted the urge to back the car up and drive away. She told herself she could at any moment. “Like I said, I’m in counseling and I’m doing better. I’m learning a lot about myself and how to function in a relationship.”
“Do you think you can? Function in a relationship? How will you keep from hitting the next woman?”
He looked away briefly. “I don’t know yet. It’s a process. But I know it’s my problem, and that’s a step in the right direction, isn’t it?”
She supposed so. It was certainly better than him blaming her, which he’d done. She didn’t answer him. Sitting here listening was the most she would give him.
He gave her a familiar puppy dog look, one that used to make her smile. “I wondered if you could ever find a way to forgive me?”
Oh, this she wanted to answer. This was what she’d worked so hard on, but not in the way he probably imagined.
She opened the door sharply, making him step back. Adrenaline pushed her out of the car to face him. She kept one hand on the car, gripping the door. “Ihaveforgiven you, Noah. But not for you. Forme. Forgiveness is for the forgiver. I don’t care if you feel better or if you’re healing. I only care thatIfeel better, thatI’mhealing. And I am. Forgiving you helped me do that. Letting go of the anger and pain in my heart so that I could maybe find happiness.”
He swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing. “Have you found that?”
“I’m working on it.”
He moved closer, and she smelled bourbon—his liquor of choice—on his breath. “With the guy at the pub?”
She heard something in his tone. Something that gave her pause. “It’s none of your business.” She climbed back into the car, thinking she never should’ve gotten out in the first place. But she hadn’t been thinking clearly. If she were, she wouldn’t even be here. “I’m going now.”
“Wait, please!”
“I’m done, Noah.”
He reached into the car and grabbed her wrist, his fingers closing around her flesh. She ripped her arm from his grasp and threw the car in reverse, the tires squealing as she hit the gas.
Without looking back, she pulled out of the parking lot and drove toward town. God, she was an idiot! Why had she stayed there to listen to him? She should’ve left the moment she’d seen him walking to the car. Was she ever going to be free of him? Could she find the happiness she wanted, that she deserved?
In that moment, she just didn’t know.
The cold night air should’ve chilled Luke, but he was numb. In mind and body. As soon as the police had let him leave The Arch and Vine, he’d walked all over, trying to find Kelsey. She wasn’t responding to his texts, and he was terrified for her. Her car was gone from his driveway, and it wasn’t in her parking lot. Her apartment was dark.
He was desperate to find her, and now, back at his house, he simply stood on his porch and stared into the darkness, feeling utterly helpless.
His phone, clutched in his grasp as it had been all night, pinged. He lifted it, screen up, and saw the text was from Cam asking if he’d found Kelsey yet. Luke typed in “No” and hit Send. Cam and Brooke had walked with him at first, trying to talk him off the ledge of despair. He’d finally told them he needed to be alone, perhaps not in the kindest way. It had gone something like: “Leave me the hell alone. I’ll call you if I need your ‘help.’”
He winced at the memory but shoved it away, because, by far, it wasn’t the worst thing that had happened tonight. He kept reliving that moment at the pub over and over. Noah touched her; Luke reacted; Kelsey looked at him in fear.
He started moving again, pacing across the porch. Why wasn’t she responding to his texts? He’d sent more after finishing with the police. Even though she hadn’t reported Noah’s restraining order violation, which was required to press charges, they were still looking for him in town. And until Luke heard from Kelsey, his insides would continue to feel like they were drowning in acid.
If Noah had somehow found her… Luke would never forgive himself.
The sound of a car pulling onto the street made him pivot. He stepped off the porch onto the stairs. The car slowed and turned. It was Kelsey.
Relief rushed over him, and his body collapsed. He dropped down and sat on the edge of the porch.
She turned the car off and came toward him, moving faster as she got closer. She paused at the bottom of the steps. “Are you all right?”
“No.” His voice creaked with emotion. “Are you? Please tell me—” He snapped his mouth shut and looked away.
“I’m fine.”
He peeked at her, afraid to see…what? He didn’t know.
She moved forward and stood before him. “Why are you sitting there?”
He felt defensive. Raw. “Why didn’t you return my texts?”
