Page 50 of The Reluctant Reaper
Gray reached out, took her hand. “So we both had older siblings who died. Why didn’t you tell me?”
Amara couldn’t meet his gaze. Anyone else would be irked, and maybe Gray was, a little, but he seemed more concerned than angry. “It’s like you always say. It’s not a contest, but if it was...”
“I’d win,” he finished.
“I both love and loathe being the person who one-ups everybody. ‘You think that’s bad, one of my brothers was mauled to death by a pregnant mountain lion six hundred years ago.’”
Gray brightened. “But that means your parents could have another baby. You’d be off the hook. Do we dare speculate about procreational activities among the very, very elderly?”
“No. Let’s stay focused instead. We have to solve thisnow; we can’t hope my mom suddenly gets morning sickness and refuses to make lefse while simultaneously serving pickled pigs’ feet with every meal.”
“Jesus Christ!”
“Well put. Dreadful in so many ways.”
Gray rubbed his forehead. “Your mom’s superhuman ovaries and your dad’s ancient-yet-perky sperm aside?—”
“Good God.”
“—here’s one of the other things I can’t figure out. If you do the math, alotof people died in your territory or demesne or whatever, way more than we could get to on our own in just one day,pluswe only Reaped half a dozen or so. How does that work?”
“You didn’t think Santa really visited three hundred million houses in one night, did you?”
“Annnnnnd you’re already losing me. Also, are you implying Santa is real? I... don’t know how I feel about that. He gave me alotof bad presents when I was a kid. Dental floss? A gift-wrapped bottle of Windex? Paper towels? Fuck’s sake. Though our windowswereincredibly clean...”
“Of course Santa’s real, but we’re getting off-topic. It’s a bubble.”
“Sorry, I thought you just said it’s a bubble.”
“Listen: I was there for Agatha and Jimbo and Beverly. But I was also there for Tanya, Scott, Renee, Dean, Shelly, and the others. It’s like... it’s a ritual. And by performing that ritual for Agatha, Jimbo, and Beverly, the others were able to pass on, too. I was with them, even though my physical body wasn’t. And it’s not just me and thee in the bubble. Each person we saw today ended up in the bubble, too.” Amara sighed. “I’m sorry. I know it doesn’t make sense.”
“Death-god shenanigans?”
She nodded. Better to call it shenanigans. A lighthearted word for the darkest agenda. She didn’t give a shit that her old music teacher was ready to die. The young woman offering her daughter’s life as a bribe to Death was much louder than Agatha’s grouchy bitching.
And this is it. This is my life now. Every day. If Dad...
If Dad...
Gray shifted his weight, leaned against the cave wall, wriggled for a few seconds, then leaned forward. “Argh, my kingdom for a back support pillow. I’m guessing a furnished, carpeted ancient cave over an even more ancient spring is dumb because of the damp alone.”
“Quite dumb.”
“And it’s not that I don’t love your cave, but why are we meeting here again?”
“Privacy. And while we’re speaking of death-god shenanigans, let’s consider our suspects.”
“I like how you used ‘our’ as if I knew what the hell was going on and was capable of being helpful.”
“You’re helpful. Look at the chain of events. My father got sick and not only stayed sick, but worsened. He was stable this morning, but sometime after breakfast, he lost consciousness.”
“We were all together in the dining hall, but I’m pretty sure everyone split up right after.”
“Correct. So: Penny and Hank.”
“Probably banging the whole time. It was obvious to everyone that they were in a rush to finish breakfast, but probably not so they could kill Death. Also, whaaaaat are those two even doing?”
“Persephone and Hades’s relationship is deeply problematic and has lasted for centuries and I cannot advise you strongly enough to stay out of it. Focus, please.”
