Page 60 of Bears Behaving Badly
Nadia’s wings fluttered as she stomped up and down Annette’s arm, further destroying her sweater. “Small game. Rabbits, shrews, voles, chicken nuggets. She loves ’em all. She is a fiend for shrews! And honey mustard dip. Winter’s coming, she has to fatten up for…Ow!”
The smaller man approached, indicating true bravery or abject stupidity, and made shooing motions at a deeply unimpressed Nadia while Annette held back her snort. The larger one had chosen option one (or three) and came right for Annette, doubtless planning to punch her into compliance if the balled fists were any indication, then toss her into the ravine to keep his stepdaughter company until they died of thirst or exposure.
So she broke his jaw.
Nadia, meanwhile, had arrowed straight for the smaller one, and his shrieks were louder than hers. His arms windmilled as he tried batting her beak and talons away from his face, and Annette (almost) sympathized. A hawk didn’t look like much from a distance, but in a full-on attack, all the prey can see and hear and feel are the furiously beating wings and screaming and slashing of a predator with an unbreakable grip and a beak like a razor. It was so sudden and painful and disorienting, the prey would run in any direction to get away, which is why he plunged over the edge and into the ravine.
Please God he doesn’t land on the kid.
The disgruntled stepfather, meanwhile, had gotten to his feet and stood, swaying, as he considered his options while blood dripped down his jaw. He took a last look at the scene and turned away.
“Wait! Jason, don’t leave me!”
“Yes, Jason.” Annette kicked the back of his knee
(a fine day to wear sturdy pointed flats)
tearing his tendon and sending him to the ground. “Don’t leave her. Look at what she was willing to do for you.”
Nadia let out a high-pitched cry, and though Annette didn’t speak red kite, it wasn’t difficult to figure out what was coming.
She sidestepped the yelping stepfather and approached Lorraine, who backed away until she tripped over a rock and sat down hard enough to bite her lip. Annette’s nostrils involuntarily flared at the scent of new blood. “I…I won’t say anything, I swear. About youoryour big weird bird.” Lorraine flinched as Nadia screeched a reprimand. “I’ll just… We’re sorry. I’m sorry. Your—your eyes are… Your eyes are all wrong. What’s wrong with… I’m sorry.”
“No. That’s not what I’m looking for. I don’t care about your apology.” Annette knelt beside her. “The paramedics and the police will be in this clearing in the next sixty seconds or so. I want you to tell them everything.Everything.Whose idea, who pushed or abandoned her, or pushedandabandoned her, and whatever follow-up bullshit course you were embarking on, and I want you to finish your story with how you decided to surrender to the authorities to alleviate your crippling guilt.”
She was nodding so hard her ponytail flopped. “I will! I’ll tell them, I promise, you don’t have to worry, okay? Okay?”
“I’m not worried. We’ve got your scent now. We can always find you. So please trust me when I say living in a cage for a couple of years is preferable to meeting us in the open.”
“Okay. I’ll… Okay. I’ll do it. Don’t touch me, okay? Please don’t touch me. I’ll do it. I swear on my life.”
“You are, actually.” A bit of an exaggeration, but she wasn’t going to clue Lorraine in to that. Annette wasn’t in the habit of running around murdering abusive Stables. No one at IPA was. Though they’d certainly been tempted. “Run along, Lorraine. But not too far. Just up to the edge. Just to see what you’ve done.” And as Lorraine just sat there, paralyzed, Annette leaned in. “Now.”
She stepped aside while Lorraine scooted past her to peer into what was supposed to be her daughter’s grave, as well as her brother’s rest stop. Now she could see as well as hear the first responders pushing their way through the trees; in a few more seconds, they’d hit the clearing. Fortunately, Annette had been holding Nadia’s clothes throughout the confrontation, so she headed down the opposite path while Nadia swooped in close
“Dammit! You’ve got to ruinbothsides of my sweater?”
and perched for a ride, content to wait for the best opportunity to shift back.
“I don’t know about you, but I need a vacation,” Annette muttered. “That wasn’t even the worst lunch break we’ve had this month. Which is insane. And now we have to keep an eye out for police reports and local news coverage. More obsessively than usual, I mean, in case there’s a damage control issue. But first, we should fortify ourselves with ice cream. Don’t glare at me, you love Milkjam as much as I do.”
* * *
Rabid Bald Eagle Attacks Drunken Campers,Star Tribune
Toddler Found in Ravine Expected to Recover; Claims Magical Eagle Fairy Saved Her,Star Tribune
Man Indicted for Attempted Murder Claims ‘Shaggy-Haired Crazy Bird Lady’ Attacked Him with Eagle,Pioneer Press
Chapter 23
“The headlines were the worst part. For us, I mean,” Annette added. “Wrong subspecies, obviously. And do eagles even get rabies? Isn’t it confined to mammals? And ‘shaggy’? I’d gotten a haircut two weeks earlier!”
“‘We’ve got your scent now’?”
“What was I supposed to say? ‘If we’re ever in the same restaurant, I might be able to pick up your scent but maybe not’ didn’t sound nearly so scary.”
David snorted. “Good point. Did you tell anyone? Or get in trouble?”
