Page 90 of Historical Hotties
“I know.”
“I’ll send word today.”
Darian turned and headed for the door, the duke stopped him.
“Darian,” he said. “I realize that this cannot be easy for you, but I will say that you have shown remarkable composure through this situation. You are to be commended.”
Darian knew what he meant. Losing the woman that a man had his heart set on was never easy. Weakly, he smiled.
“I simply want her to be happy, your grace,” he said. “I have reconciled myself to the fact that it is not with me.”
The duke nodded faintly, unwilling to comment more. He had acknowledged that sad dynamic as much as he was going to and he suspected Darian did not wish to discuss it further, either. Therefore, he waved his hand.
“Go, then,” he said. “If she will not send for the man, then we will. Mayhap youwillmake her happy, Darian. Just not in the way you had hoped.”
Darian smiled weakly and quit the solar to go about his business, leaving the duke sitting at his table, wondering if this entire situation was salvageable.
They were going to find out.
*
An apology.
Dacia still couldn’t believe that Amata had come to deliver an apology. Instead of being pleased by it, or happy with it, it just seemed to make things worse.
Her anger had returned.
Perhaps it would have been best had Amata simply faded away, forgotten by a world she tried so hard to control. It seemed to Dacia that her father had involved himself too late in this situation– where had he been during the most formative years when Amata should have been taught right from wrong, love from hate, and how not to build a life on lies? Perhaps she should not have blamed Hugh, but it seemed to her that the man did a terrible job of raising his daughter.
Cousin or no cousin, she had no use for him.
And she did not accept Amata’s apology.
The past two weeks had passed in a fog. Every day was the same and every night was endless. Dacia had slept, of course, but fitfully and only periodically, waking into a darkened room with Cassius on her mind. She wondered where he was, and what he was doing, and if he hated her overly for what she had done.
Although Dacia had convinced herself that sending him away had indeed been the best thing for them both, there was also a part of her that wondered even if she had allowed him to remain, if the pressure of being married to a hated woman would have taken its toll on him. If he would have risen every morning and wondered why he had stayed. She wouldn’t have been able to live with herself had she seen resentment in his eyes when he looked at her.
It was thoughts like those that convinced her that she had done the best thing for them both.
But, oh, how glorious it had been to have known such love and happiness and acceptance for just a few days. Those few days with Cassius had been the best days of her life and something she would always remember. Perhaps the old sayingwas right– perhaps it was better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all, and she was grateful that for a brief and shining moment in time, she had loved and had been loved.
She would have to cling to that memory in the dark years to come.
But the situation had markedly changed. With Amata’s confession, she knew that she could send for Cassius and tell him that everything was all right. She could hope for his return. But given the circumstances of their separation, she wasn’t entirely sure that he would want to return to her. She had shut herself away and refused to speak with him, and he had spent two solid days outside of her door, begging her to open it.
It had been the most painful time of her life.
There had been moments when Cassius simply talked about anything he could think of, having a one-sided conversation as if there were two people involved. She would hear him speak of his grandparents, his father’s parents that he loved so dearly, and he spoke on how they met and married under somewhat clandestine circumstances. He would tell her that most of the men in his family had not had easy paths to marriage. He would tell her that everything would be all right if she would only open the door.
But she had refused.
On the morning of the third day, Cassius had finally given up. Dacia had awoken to silence. She was so used to waking up to the sound of his voice, that the silence had been deafening as well as heartbreaking because she knew he had given up the fight. So much of her wanted to open that door and run after him, but she didn’t. She couldn’t. She couldn’t bring Cassius into the hell that was swirling around her.
He needed a wife who wasn’t being accused of unspeakable things.
After that, the depression set in. Hardly eating and hardly sleeping had taken its toll. Dacia’s clothing was beginning to hang on her and Edie had been trying to take in some of the things that were obviously bagging. The beautiful yellow fabric that she had dyed for Amata’s birthday was being turned into a new surcoat for Dacia. Edie had been a great comfort to her, the only comfort she would allow near her.
Dacia simply couldn’t handle anyone else.
