Page 82 of The Scandal You Started
“What do you mean,no? I need to wipe you down and then strip you out of your clothes. Now.”
She tried to pull his hand off, but his shaking fingers squeezed her wrist. “I do not want you to touch me.”
For some reason, his statement made her skin sting in anger. “Stop being ridiculous. It’s my responsibility to take care of you, and I have to touch you to do that.”
“No. I do not want…to be your responsibility.”
“Well, you are.”
“No.Please.” His gravelly voice cracked on his plea.
A set of sharp claws dug into Rayna’s chest, curling into the muscle behind her rib cage.
It wasn’t guilt, not quite sympathy either. It almost kind of hurt, but she couldn’t explain why. Only it made her shoulders fall and mouth twist to the side as she stared at the pained pinch between his thick brows.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “But I have to. Even if it’s against your consent.”
“Ray—”
“Just this once. It’ll make you feel a bit better.”
She unfastened his fingers from her wrist and kept hold of his hand as she pressed the towel to his forehead, covering his eyes. He released a rough, shuddering exhale, his fingers curling overhers, and she wiped down his temple and around the side of his whiskered face.
“This is not making me feel better,” he whispered when she dragged the flannel down the other side. “It is torture. I wish for it to end.” She wiped over his reddened ear and behind it. “I wish you had not seen me so.” She patted along the line of his jaw. “I wish you were not my Guardian.” And wiped his other ear. “I wish…I wish not for this.”
Rayna drew the cloth down his neck, holding it against each bit of skin for a few seconds before moving to a new area. She stared into the thin glimpse of his stunning irises.
Maybe it was what he said, the way he was watching her, his vulnerability, or the fact his exhaustion resonated through the marrow of her bones, but…
I didn’t wish for this either.
And upon that one single, aligned thought, all the words—that feelingshe’d locked behind chains a few days ago, swearing she’d never unlock it—clanked undone and poured forth.
Except no panic rose and gripped her by the throat. Rather, the churn of discomfort was gone from her belly, and a serenity took its place.
“You think this has been easy for me?” she heard herself mutter.
The only sign of surprise from him was the twitch of his fingers around hers.
Leaning over him, she rubbed the flannel down his arm. “Do you think it was easy, realising I was attracted to a Study even though I knew I shouldn’t be? When it’s never happened before. Because I’ve never failed to be professional while doing my job.Ever. But you…”
She wiped his individual fingers. “You made it fucking impossible, Dominic.” Cleaning his palm, she forced herself tomeet his unmoving stare. “Every boundary I tried to set, you just walked right through it like some indestructible bear.”
Her skin warmed under the intensity of his gaze. “Every time you touched me, every time you looked at me, all fucking horny, all those shameless erections when I hadn’t even touched you.” She grew more frustrated with each thing she listed. “All those loud laughs, and your curiosity, and conversations. Your stupid compliments, sneaking into my room every night, and just constantly being affectionate. Gosh, you’ve been so fucking relentless.”
Rayna exhaled before wiping back up his arm. Then she moved onto the arm of the hand she held but stopped halfway when his fingers clamped around hers.
“I cannot apologise for it,” he mumbled. “Even if you want me to, I cannot. I would not mean it.”
She flashed him an annoyed little smile. “Yeah, I know, you persistent idiot. But don’t act like this was easy for me. It wasn’t—it isn’t. Knowing you’re a Study…but wanting you anyway.”
Gulping, she tried not to shift in discomfort under the knowledge that she’d admitted something she wasn’t supposed to. Unable to take his silence, she focused on flipping the flannel in half with one hand.
“Why are you telling me this?”
“I…don’t know,” she admitted, then placed the cloth on his exposed abdomen. She couldn’t help noticing there were no defined lines of abs, only one flat plain with a sharp V cut into it.
With a low gasp, Dominic jerked, and his stomach contracted under her touch.
