Page 72 of The Leaves In Autumn
Layla takes a seat on his lap. Sam takes a paper napkin from the table and waves it in defeat.
“I hate you all,” he says chuckling.
“Okay, Mom. Get up here.”
Aurora rises, gives Gaston a kiss, and takes a name from the bag. The lullaby continues on repeat.
“Van, come here. Momma isn’t going to hurt you. I used to sing this to you when you were a baby.”
“I always hated that song. And your voice.”
It makes us laugh our asses off. Especially Aurora.
“Prepare yourself, then!”
Walking to where she stands, he holds out a hand and they wordlessly shake. Water is taken. Immediately they have a hard time continuing. There is a gagging sound coming from Aurora, and every time it sounds, Van starts laughing. His cheeks are inflating and deflating. He gets control and gives her a signal with his curled fist.
“Mph fro.”
“Uh cru.”
“That’s what she said.”
Van’s comment lands like a bullseye. We are almost falling off our chairs. I curl up on the chaise and hold my sides.
She nods.One, two, three. Her paper covers his rock. Stoically he stands, ready for the slap. It comes on cat feet. A limp tortilla barely connects with his face.
“Crmmm owrrr!” he protests.
The second slap he did not expect. It lands with a loud slapping sound. He holds in the water, but the strain releases him of a surprise fart. They both spit out every drop of water on each other. Oh my God!! I can’t take it anymore!
“I’m peeing my pants!”
“Dude! Was that a fart?!”
“I’m dying!!”
“Thank God you got it on camera!”
“You’re all extremely immature,” Van says, waving both hands at the group.
“Don’t be waving that our way!”
“Oh honey, I’m so sorry!” Aurora says not at all convincingly.
Gaston offers his opinion.
“You shouldn’t have insulted your mother’s voice.”
“I will never be as happy as I am at this moment,” Teddy laughs and checks the camera.
“Alright. It’s over. Who’s next up?”
I catch Aargon’s gaze, and we both have tears in our eyes.
“Why do you like this family so much? We have no control over ourselves!”
“That’s why.”
