“Whatever for?” Zan says, wrapping a leg around mine.
I look around my teeny tiny bedroom. “For making you sleep in this shoebox.”
He kisses my forehead and lips. “I like your shoebox. It’s cozy. And it’s real.”
“Oh it’s real alright,” I say nodding.
He chuckles. “Can you understand how seldom I get to live in the real world?”
Laying my head against his chest I mull his words over. What a strange reality he knows. Always the subject of other people’s interest. Having to steal moments of privacy when he can. It must be so hard. I think it would get tiring, but he seems so stable. And there’s a joy living in him despite his history. He’s survived the sorrows. Any reference to being a Royal Pain has new meaning. He’s known pain. All this insight and we just met a week ago. How can I know anything for certain?
“What are you thinking?” His voice brings me back to earth. My fingers trace the shape of his.
“I’m thinking we have so much to learn about each other, and I don’t see how we’re going to be able to do it from afar.”
He comes up on an elbow and stops me from biting my lip.
“Don’t hurt that beautiful lip. You need it for kissing me.”
I give a perfunctory nod of agreement. My mind is elsewhere.
“Listen, Belinda. I think we should show a little faith. Have a little faith. I don’t want this to slip through the cracks. Do you?”
“No! Definitely not. I just don’t…”
His kiss quiets my fears and reminds me of what I know for certain. In my life whenever I really wanted something I’d move heaven and earth to get it, accomplish it, or understand it. No matter how out of my reach it seemed. I’ve been an adventurous soul, not afraid to face the unknown. Especially if it’s what needs to be traversed to get to the prize.
Now, something magically meaningful is in my sights. It seems like destiny. But it’s made of unfamiliar feelings and surprising twists. I’ve never known this pull toward another person before. What a fool I’d be to deny it’s happening. Am I going to let an ocean come between us? Will different time zones be our undoing? Should I give up before we’re even apart?
No. I’d never forgive myself if I didn’t see what’s right in front of me.
I seal my decision with a kiss.