Page 43 of The Space He Left
“So you were her hero then, too.”
It wasn't a question. It was a statement of fact. My gut clenched.
I reached into my jacket and pulled out the crumpled letter from Harper’s lawyer. I didn’t need to read it; the words were branded on my mind. I smoothed it out and handed it to him.
Dr. Cox read it in silence, his expression unchanging. When he finished, he placed it on the table between us.
“This is a clear and painful consequence,” he said. “It seems your wife has established some very firm boundaries.”
“She thinks I was having an affair,” I said, the words choking me. “The whole town does. Sam, my best friend, he thinks so too.”
“Were you?”
“No! Never.”
“But you were giving another woman your time, your energy, your emotional support. You were prioritizing her needs over your pregnant wife’s. In a way, Jack, you were having an affair. Just not a physical one. An emotional affair.”
The idea hit me like a splash of ice water. An emotional affair. I’d never even heard the term.
Dr. Cox made a note on his pad, his expression unreadable. "We'll come back to that," he said, his tone making it clear it was a statement, not a suggestion. "For now, let's talk about Harper. Tell me about her. How did you two meet?”
“Her car broke down,” I said, the memory feeling like it belonged to another man’s life. “In the parking lot of the community center. I was doing a renovation there. I helped her get it started, gave her a ride. She was… strong, independent. But she needed help that day.”
Dr. Cox just nodded, letting me connect the dots myself. I had rescued her, too. Right from the very beginning. My entire life, every significant relationship, had been built on this broken foundation of me needing to rush to the rescue.
“You have a well-developed rescuer pattern, Jack. Some might call it a hero complex,” Dr. Cox said. “You derive your sense of self-worth from solving other people’s crises. It’s not about them, not really. It’s about you. It’s about fulfilling a deep-seated need to feel important and valued.”
He leaned forward again, his gaze unwavering. “You weren’t just helping Madison. You were using her crisis to feel like the man you thought you were supposed to be. The problem is, while you were off playing the hero in a story she wrote for you, you abandoned your role as a husband and father in the real one.”
I stared at him, the truth of his words stripping away every excuse, every rationalization I’d ever made. I hadn’t been agood man helping a friend in need. I’d been a man with a flawed character, feeding his own ego, and the cost of that self-indulgence was the family I loved.
The hour was up. I stood on shaky legs, my mind reeling. I had come in here thinking my problem was Madison. I was leaving realizing the problem was me. It had always been me.
Chapter 15
Jack
The phone rang at eight o'clock, just as I was leaving the Inn for another day of trying to salvage Henderson Construction. I answered without looking at the screen, assuming it was Pete with an update on the Moye project.
"Hello?"
"Jackie? Oh God, Jackie, where are you?"
The voice hit me like a splash of ice water. Madison. My stomach clenched. It wasn't the first time she'd called. Over the past three days, her name had flashed on my screen a dozen times. I had ignored every single one, letting them go to voicemail, unwilling to be drawn back into the vortex of her manufactured crises. But this time, I'd answered by accident, and now I was trapped.
"I got back to the hotel, and you weren't there," she said, her voice breathless and panicked. "The surgery went well, but I was so scared when I woke up alone this morning. There’s been no word from you for days, Jackie. I've been so scared! I need you right now."
The old Jack, the man from just a few days ago, would have been consumed by guilt. He would have apologized, made excuses, and probably already been halfway to his truck. But, for the first time in months, I didn't just hear her panic. I listened to the words she was saying.
"Your surgery went well?" I asked, my voice carefully neutral.
"Yes, thank God. The doctors think they got everything. But Jackie, I was so frightened when I woke up and you weren't here. Why weren't you here? I need you."
"Where exactly did you have this surgery, Madison?"
There was a slight pause. "St. Mary's, like I told you. Jackie, why are you asking me this? I need you right now."
"St. Mary's doesn't have a cancer center."
