Page 2 of Awakening
He gestured for me to sneak outside. I quietly got up, slippedon some sweats under my sleep shirt, and snuck out to see what he wanted.
“Why are you here? If we get caught, I’m selling you out,” I fussed, causing him to chuckle.
“Couldn’t sleep,” he whispered, “Too much in my head.”
Hesitation overcame me, “S—Same.”
We stayed quiet, but only briefly before I asked, “You ever feel like the more they break you down here, the harder it is to remember who you were before you came?”
Exhaling, he looked at my eyes full of confidence. “Yeah. But then I look over at you, and I remember.”
Taken aback by his response, I asked, “Huh? I—I don’t get it.”
A moment passed, then another.
Colson sat in the grass, resting his arms on his knees, voice low, “I mean… You walk through this place like you’ve got fire in your bones. You hold your head up even when you’re tired, even when they try to crush you. You remind me of why I came here in the first place. Why do I keep going?”
I sat next to him, stretching my hoodie over my bent knees. The moonlight painted soft silver edges along his face. His model-perfect jawline, full lips, and sinewy eyes that always looked like they were holding something back were staring right through me.
“Colson…”
“I know it’s probably not smart,” he said, voice rough now, raw, “But I’ve had a thing for you since the first week. A thing I keep trying to shut down so that I can focus on the reason I’m here.”
“Why are you here?” I probed.
“To secure a future for myself. To stay out the streets so I don’t meet the same fate as my father and brother—jail. I try to be professional, but the truth is… I see you. And I care about you more than I meant to.”
I didn’t speak; I didn’t ask any follow-up questions. I just sat there, my heart pounding furiously loud and fast against my chest.
“I think about you,” he went on, “At night when we’re lining up, when you're shouting cadence. When you're laughing under your breath after we go back and forth. No matter the setting, you take up space in my mind.”
Reaching over, my fingers brushing against his wrist, “Why didn’t you say anything before now? Is that why you always want to verbally joust with me?”
“No. I bother you because I can always expect a witty comeback full of feistiness. I can’t stop thinking about you because you’re a damn force, Ajaih. And I don’t want to mess with your focus or mine by introducing love so early in the life we’re building professionally.”
Love.
I was stunned into silence, but as our eyes met in the darkness, the tension between us said everything we couldn’t.
I leaned in slightly so that my forehead rested against his. “You’re not messing anything up,” I said, my lips mere inches from his. “You’re one of few people who makes me feel like I can breathe, even when you’re on my damn nerves.”
Closing the rest of the gap between us, our lips crashed into each other; there was nothing slow or tentative about this kiss. It was urgent and filled with more questions than answers. When Colson grabbed the back of my neck, deepening the kiss, it felt like exhaling after holding my breath for weeks.
We pulled back just enough to look at each other.
“You sure, Jeffries?” he asked, voice gravelly, lips brushing mine.
“Never more,” I confirmed, stealing a kiss.
“Follow me,” he ordered, grabbing my hand as we stood and headed to the old dorms that were no longer being used.
Picking the lock, Colson opened the door, my hand still in his as he led the way. The dorm was in pristine condition, just outdated. After quietly shutting and locking the door, we fell onto one of the bunks, careful not to make too much noise.
My breathing got heavier as Colson’s fingers laced with mine beneath the thin military-issued blanket. The room was still, and every sound, every breath, felt amplified in the solitude of this moment.
My eyes meeting his eyes, my voice a low murmur, “I want this, I want you.”
The moment cracked open.
