Page 89 of Sweet Spot
“You have to stop beating yourself up for things that happened in the past and start living your life. It wasn’t your fault. I know it, Lacey knows it, heck, you’re probably the only one who doesn’t know it. But that isn’t the point. You either need to believe that or decide to forgive yourself anyway so you can move on.”
“I’m a workaholic with a schedule that makes it damn near impossible to date, let alone be in a serious relationship.”
“Then why are you upset?”
I grind down on my molars.
“Keira isn’t Lacey. Don’t make the mistake of pushing her away because you’re scared. You’ve never been a coward. Don’t start now.”
“What if I hurt Keira the same way?” I shake my head, the thought physically painful.
“You won’t.”
“How can you know that?”
“Because you’re too smart and too stubborn to make the same mistake twice.”
I wish I could believe that.
After dinner, Gram makes a plate for Keira and takes it into the spare room in case she wakes up hungry.
“Are you staying?” she asks as she turns out the kitchen lights.
“Yeah.” I grab the throw blanket off the back of the couch, and Gram brings me a pillow. “Thanks.”
She kisses my cheek, gives me a sad smile, and heads to bed.
Once I’m settled on the couch, I stare up at the ceiling as silence falls over the house. I think about what Gram said, trying to make it fact in my head and heart, but I know to my core I didn’t do right by Lacey.
I didn’t fight for her or for us. I was relieved when it was over because it was one less responsibility and distraction. That’s a shitty realization—to know your marriage has gone up in flames and you’re happy about it.
Nowhere near sleep, I throw off the blanket and quietly head down the hallway. I rest my hand on the wooden door and try to talk myself out of going inside. I rap my knuckles lightly and then push the door open just enough to see through a crack. The room is dark, save for the dim light coming from the lamp on the bedside table that casts her small frame in shadows.
She’s turned away from it, and the comforter is askew and bunched up at her feet. Moving to the bed in two long strides, I settle in behind her and pull the blanket over us. Wrapping my arm around her, I breathe easy for the first time in days.
33
Keira
I already knowhe’s gone before I open my eyes. His scent lingers, but the bed is entirely too cold and quiet without him. I don’t know when he joined me, but I woke in the middle of the night with Lincoln wrapped around me like a cocoon.
I should have told him to go so I wouldn’t have to feel the sadness of losing him all over again, but instead I let myself enjoy one more night in his arms.
A plate of food and two water bottles sit on the nightstand, and I down one of the waters before getting out of bed. I tear off a hunk of bread and chew it while I put on my shoes. My body is achy, and I definitely don’t feel one hundred percent, but I’ll survive. I have to. I need to block out the pain, swing by the hotel, shower, and get to the course.
“Good morning. I made breakfast,” Milly says as I tiptoe through the living room, trying to make an escape.
I turn, plastering a thankful and convincing smile on my lips. “I have to get going. Thank you so much for letting me stay last night. I feel much better after a good night’s sleep.”
My eyes dart around the living room, kitchen, dining room, and then finally the patio, but I don’t see Lincoln anywhere.
“He isn’t here.” She sets a plate on the dining room table. “Come on. You’ll be dropping at the third hole without a good breakfast.”
“Where is he?” I follow the scent of hash browns and eggs.
“Some sort of work emergency. He said to tell you that he’d see you at the course.”
Work. Of course.
