Page 57 of Electric Blue Love
My eyes landed on Court and he tilted my chin up to meet his gaze head on. “Where’d you go, 8B?”
I shook my head. “I’m sorry. I just realized how late it is. I really should get home before my parents worry.”
He nodded, but his eyebrows drew together, and he looked like he wanted to interject or stop me.
“Sure, let’s get dressed and I’ll ride with you back to your place.”
I pushed past him, already on my feet and gathering my purse, before he could finish the sentence. “No, that’s silly. It’s late. I’ll be fine. I’ve taken cabs by myself in New York hundreds of times.”
His hands were shoved deep in his pockets as he regarded me carefully, scrutinizing me like he could see every thought as clearly as I they raced through my mind.
“Did I do something wrong?”
My stomach dropped because I knew asking cost him a piece of his pride. I was running just like he was afraid everyone he let close would do, but I couldn’t explain the reasons I needed to be alone anymore than I could explain the way my heart was breaking as I crossed his apartment and opened the door.
“Of course not. Today was perfection,” I said stealing his word. I blew him a kiss, memorized him with the New York city skyline behind him and I left.
His first text came as the cab pulled up in front of my house.
Court: Let me know when you make it home.
Me: Just got here. Safe and sound!
Court’s next response wasn’t immediate. I was washing my face in the hall bathroom when I heard my phone ding from my bedroom. I scrubbed my face with the washcloth quickly and padded down the hallway with my heart in my throat. The time since I’d left Court’s apartment hadn’t made this twisted fake relationship any clearer, but if my eager response to read a text message was any indication of how I felt – I wasn’t ready to say goodbye to Court.
Court: How do you feel? You’re not too sore I hope.
Me: A little sore.
I pressed send and then added.
Me: Totally worth it.
Court: Take some Tylenol or Ibuprofen before you go to bed sweet girl. Breakfast or lunch before you head back tomorrow?
Me: I can’t. I have the breakfast with my family tomorrow.
I tapped my fingers nervously on the side of the phone while I waited for his response. Thirty seconds. A minute. Two.
“Ugh,” I groaned out loud into the empty room as I waited for him to respond. To say anything. I didn’t want this to be the end, but breakfast with my family was non-negotiable. I’d barely seen my brothers this trip.
Me: The invitation to come with us is still on the table.
Court: What time and where?
I texted directions and switched my phone to silent. I didn’t wait for Court to text back. Couldn’t take any lame excuses why he couldn’t or didn’t want to go. Instead, I laid my head down on the pillow in my childhood bedroom and forced myself not to worry about graduation, my family, or a future without Court.
“Where’s Mom?” Iasked, when I emerged from the haven of my bedroom the next morning. The twins were at the kitchen table with large bowls of cereal like we weren’t going to breakfast in ten minutes.
The smile on my dad’s face was tired and regretful. “She picked up a shift at the diner.”
“What? No, we were supposed to have breakfast together this morning.”
“She’ll be there.”
“It’s not the same,” I pouted and crossed my arms across my chest.
The twins stood, nearly in unison, and put their bowls in the sink. The three men of my family walked from the kitchen toward me.
