Page 93 of Mister Cowboy
“I know I should have called,” he said, but she threw her arms around his neck, and his voice trailed off.
“I’m sorry,” she said, muffled against his ear. “I thought I needed time away from you to figure things out, but I swear to God, I’ve never been more excited to see someone in my entire life. I guess that’s my answer, huh?”
He swore he fell a little more in love with her right then for putting a bright spot in a shit day.
“I have something for you,” she said, pulling away and jogging toward her bedroom. “There’s beer or soda in the fridge, make yourself comfortable. I’ll be right back.”
He shrugged off his coat and laid it over the arm of the couch before sitting down. Letting out a deep breath, he loosened his tie and let his body relax. What a fucking day.
January returned with the largest smile he’d ever seen, holding a small package and sitting down beside him.
“For you,” she said, handing it to him.
“What’s this?” he asked, turning it over in his hands.
“Open it.”
He tore the paper and pulled out a journal. He stared down at it, running a hand over the leather cover. Turning the first page his heart dropped as he read the words written in January’s neat print letters.For you to write to your own children, knowing that someday they’ll look to you for the same guidance you wanted.
“I thought you might want to journal to your own kid. Write down everything you want him or her to know.” She looked at him with a nervous smile.
He closed the journal and held it in one hand, staring down at it with a feeling of sadness for what he’d lost.
His mother.
His father.
A child he’d wanted against all odds.
This was the moment to tell her about Nadia. The words weighed down his tongue.
“It’s perfect. Thank you.”
And it would have been. The idea of passing on his words the way his father had done excited him. Only now there was no child.
“I think maybe the hardest part about reading his journals was facing how selfish I’d been. I may not have liked his decisions, but I should have gone back sooner and made my peace with it and with him while he was still alive. Now I’ll never have that chance. I don’t want to have any more regrets. Especially not with you. I love you too damn much to let anything come between us. We’ll take this slow, do it right this time.”
Her smile faded for the briefest moment before she reached out and squeezed his hand. “Okay.”
50
January
“Morning, handsome,” she said, pushing her body against his. He looked peaceful as his eyes fluttered open, but even as his lips pulled into a smile and revealed the dimple in one side, the shadows that had been there yesterday returned. Something was up with him. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it. Was he upset that she’d ignored his calls? Was he regretting his decision to be with her instead of Nadia?
“What do you have planned for today?” she asked, pulling the covers over her shoulder and sliding a hand over his bare chest.
“I’m heading out to the ranch to see Henry this afternoon. Wanna come?”
“I wish I could, but I’m working at the bar, but I thought maybe we could do brunch or maybe breakfast in bed?” she asked as she climbed on top of him.
He placed both hands behind his head. “I can probably be convinced of the latter.”
She moved down his body and pulled his boxer briefs down and tossed them on the floor. Damn. She’d never get tired of looking at him. At all of him.
Wrapping one hand around the base, she brought her mouth down to the tip of his penis and parted her lips. She flicked her tongue out and moved her hand up slowly to meet it.
A hiss left his lips, and she smiled, taking him fully into her mouth. She started slow, drawing out the pleasure for him, giving him everything she had. She could feel that he needed her, felt it in the same way she knew he was it for her.
