Not after all that’s happened.
I can’t face Anthony. Not just because of the public humiliation and his blatant disrespect for my reputation, but because despite all that he’s done to me, I don’t know if I can look him in the eye.
Not now I’m in love with his best friend.
Not ever again.
But I have no idea how to manipulate the situation, because I know without a shadow of a doubt that whatever I do, my husband will never release me from our marriage.
To him, I’m a possession.
And even though he doesn’t want me, he won’t tolerate me being with anyone else. Especially Rian Beckett.
‘Good. That’s settled. In fact, I think you should stay for a few weeks.’
‘I suppose I could tell Anthony I need some space. We’ve both behaved badly; it’s not entirely uncalled for, before one of us murders the other one.’
Rian glowers. ‘If he so much as lays a finger on you.’
‘He won’t.’ At least I don’t think so anyway. A flashback of the way he eyed me in the kitchen on New Year’s Eve morning bursts into my brain. A shiver ripples over my spine. Yes, maybe it’s safer to get some space.
Rian motions for Zara to budge up so he can squeeze in next to me. He leans into my ear so his family can’t hear us, but Avery isn’t even trying to hide the fact her ears are pricked up like a dog’s. ‘Anthony behaved badly. Time and time again over the years. You at least tried, Rebekka. How much more will you give him before there’s nothing left for yourself? Stay with me for a few weeks, please. Nothing has to happen between us again—not until you’re ready. I just hate the idea of him chipping away at you all the time.’
The prospect of staying with him is so tempting.
But the problem is, there’s no way I’ll be able to keep my hands off him. Not now I know what I’ve been missing out on for all these years. It’s not just the sex; it’s the intimacy—feeling cherished, protected and desired. Rian is my safe space.
He has been for a while.
‘Don’t worry about anything.’ Rian presses a kiss to my temple. ‘I’ll get Callaghan to fetch some of your things. Maybe a cooling-off period is exactly what you need.’
I don’t think I’ll be cool at Rian’s place.
In fact, something tells me things will be hotter than an inferno.
But while Anthony is parading his PA around Dublin, I may as well have some fun.
But this can only ever be a fling.
Or Iwilllose everything.
Chapter Thirty-Five
RIAN
There’s no more talk of marriage for the rest of the night, thank God. While I told Rebekka we’re just having a bit of fun, I’m not fooling either of us. And moving her into my apartment is the first step in saving her from that bastard she calls husband.
I’ll never forgive him for humiliating her the way he did tonight, which is why I don’t feel nearly as guilty as I should for the events that occurred afterwards. I can no longer say I’m obsessed with my best friend’s wife; I’m obsessed with a woman who’s married to a man I barely know anymore.
‘What are we doing?’ Rebekka says as she nuzzles into my chest beneath the covers of my queen-sized bed.
‘I’m hoping we’re going to have sex again.’ I reach for her hips and rock her until she’s on top of me. She spreads her legs, straddling me.
‘As usual, you default back to humour for deflection.’ Her palms run over my pecs, skimming over my nipples. I stare at her through the moonlight slanting in the window.
‘Sweetheart, I’m not joking.’ I buck my hips up, nudging her slit with my erection. She’s dripping with desire.
‘You told me nothing has to happen again until I’m ready,’ she whispers. A flash of white teeth assures me she’s smiling.