Page 78 of Queen of the Night
She returns the spool and reaches for another, but I’m already moving past, my eyes having caught on a shiny copper scale, but just past it… My gaze locks with eyes the color of the ribbon Renna just replaced, and I freeze. The one man I never planned to see again. My eyes widen further when I spot Darvy and Rhosse behind him, and behindthem, a slew of soldiers and at least one originator.
Rupi chirps with pure joy, her tiny wings brushing my neck, fluttering and bouncing with excitement—it appears she’s spotted him as well. There are only three reasons they’d be here: Ikar wants me as an originator, he’s determined to get the names on that list from me, or he knows I’m a Tulip and he’shere to collect. With the size of his entourage, it’s likely one of the last two.
Our eyes stay locked for a moment that feels like forever, and something cracks within me. I know I can’t be near him again and still keep my promises.I can’t.I beat the rebellious part of me that yearns to run to him into submission. I stumble back one step, then two as I ignore Rupi’s joyful chirps and flapping wings. Did Mama Tina rat me out? I know how she loves Ikar. I curse my stupidity. I should never have returned to Mama Tina’s, at least, not right away. I was just trying to follow the rules for once. Tatania told me to come here, and look where that got me.
“Vera?” Renna asks, frowning and looking around carefully.
I can tell from the way she steps closer that my behavior has scared her.
I don’t answer as I hurriedly look right and left, trying to calculate a way to escape the busy market, all the while keeping an eye on Ikar and his soldiers as they make their way through the crowds toward me. His determined eyes never leave mine.
I slip the strap of my bag over my head and, cursing Ikar, shove it toward Renna as Rupi quills up and squawks at my behavior, her quills stabbing my neck. I ignore her. “Take this back to Mama Tina and hide. I’ll return when I can. Don’t break anything!”
Renna sputters in confusion, but I’m already running. Rupi jumps from my shoulder and takes flight, soaring just above me. I sprint through the market. People jump out of my way, cursing at me as I pass, but I navigate the market as if I designed it myself. My hair, left down today, flows like a sail behind me. I wish I could tie it back, but there’s no time.I hear sounds of pursuit, shouting and yelling as Ikar makes his way after me. I use the fear to fuel my pumping legs.
I continue sprinting through the fae city and out the gates, knowing if I can reach the forest I have my best chance at losing him.Never mind that I almost kissed him in my dream last night—this is different.
I know this terrain like the back of my hand, so I leave the path and dive into thick trees, darting between them. I hear him shout my name and I shake my head, willing tears to stay at bay.Keep running. I hate that I run as a coward, but it’s this or face capture and possible execution for treason for all my secrets… or bridging and betraying my sisters.
I jump over fallen trees and large rocks, and push off tree trunks to increase my speed. I smother the yearning in my heart that tells me to stop, to tell him everything, to trust him. But I can’t betray my sisters; I made a blazingoath. I ignore the scratches across my face from low-hanging branches. But no matter how fast I run, I can feel him behind me.
“Vera, stop!” His voice is closer now.
In my panic and speed, I miscalculate the width of a ravine, and instead of landing firmly on the opposite side, end up sliding down the edge and rolling back down to the bottom. I try to rise, but my body aches, and my lungs have never burned so badly.
Ikar grabs my shoulder, and I pull my knife and arc it toward him, knowing it’s useless. In moments, he has my weapon in hand and straddles me with my arms above my head.
“We’re back to this?” he asks, voice low.
I hate that I missed the sound of his voice. His hair is mussed as he hovers over me, his blue eyes icy. We both stare at each other, breathing heavily. A drop of sweat slides into myhairline. It feels like the worst sort of deja vu. I could laugh, seeing him atop me in this way again—just like the night I arrested him. But instead of him cuffed, it’ll likely be me, because I won’t be cooperating.
My mind spins for the right approach, and I quickly decide to play innocent.
“Need another originator?” I ask, still out of breath, my chest heaving and aching with the feelings that attempt to claw their way out with the help of my rebellious magic. “I’m retired now, so you’ll have to find another.”
He says nothing, just delves into my eyes with his like he’s searching for something. I attempt to wipe everything from my expression.Epitome of innocence. I fixate on a small scar that marks his ear, but somehow eventhatis handsome because it’s onhim,and I don’t need those sort of thoughts at the moment.
“You forgot to tell me something,” he growls.
I stop breathing for a full three seconds. I somehow am able to dig up a saucy tone, though I can hardly fill my lungs. “I didn’tforgetanything.”
I’m almost positive he’s talking about that blasted list again.
Now I hear the raw anger in his voice. “You knew exactly who I was searching for and still?—”
“I can’t break my promises!” I shout with a frustrated sob as I try to force his weight off me, jerking my wrists held firm in his hands.
“If you had trusted me, we could have?—”
“We could have nothing!” I shout, interrupting him again.
The voices of the many people clamoring for my fealty scream and bounce within the walls of my mind. I yank again at my wrists held firm in his grasp. I’m well and fully stuck. Habit has Tatania’s warning running clear in my mind—never trust the kings—but I shut it down. I don’t trustanyoneanymore. Tatania lied about kings for years; Ikar is nothing like she said he should be. Mama Tina ratted me out. Ikar hid his identity. Rupi, my once-loyal guide, loves Ikar more than any man she’s ever met. I feel pulled in every direction, and I don’t know which is right.
I just need him to leave because somehow, though his arms hold me captive, they’re the only place I want to be, and Ican’t.My emotions turn and twist like the beginnings of a tornado, collecting pain and anger and building strength. All I know is I need space to figure my life out, to figure out whatmyopinions really are, to figure out what is the morally right thing to do.Protect my sisters or trust Ikar? Because apparently there’s no situation where both are safe.But I can’t do that beneath Ikar’s weight with his painfully handsome face hovering over mine. I’m also aware that Darvy and Rhosse and their soldiers are not far behind.
Anxiety combines with anger, and all I can think is escape. I can hardly bear to force the rising, harsh words from my mouth, but I need him to leave before I cave to my feelings and make everything worse. I’m about to open my mouth, but I get a reaction I don’t expect.
He lowers his face toward mine, until I feel the roughness of half a day’s whiskers brush the side of my cheek and the light whisper of his breath near my ear, and my body traitorously reacts. “I will do whatever I have to to earn your tru?—”
