Page 19 of Queen of the Night
“Twenty-six.”
I frown at the smile he attempts to smother. “What will you do in your retirement?”
“I’ve always dreamt of having my own shop, selling things I’ve collected over the course of my travels.”
He nods. “Okay…” A slow smile turns his lips. “Do you want to know what else I’m really curious about?”
I almost audibly sigh in relief. “What?” I play along, more than happy to move on to a different topic.
He lowers his voice. “I’m wondering what happened between the two of you.” He arches a brow as he uses his chin to gesture toward Ikar ahead of us.
“Do you mean the fact that I arrested him under the assumption he was a Class A criminal and just a few short weeks later, he’s my contractor?” I smile sweetly. “We do havequitethe history.”
He grins. Apparently, he thinks I’m funny. I have no idea how he and Rhosse became friends. Darvy is handsome in a boyish way, his honey-brown hair long on top, brushing his forehead and slightly mussed; the sides are short like those in the Moneyrean army keep it. His green eyes are lit with humor almost constantly, he has a dimple to die for, and his smile is quick. Rhosse is almost the direct opposite.
I decide to turn the tables on him in a strategic sort of way. There’s a question I need answered. “Doyouplan to ever retire?”
“When I can no longer do my duty to my king, yes.”
I press him further. “Butcanyou retire early, if you choose?”
He laughs a little at my persistence and shakes his head. “It’s not done by the highest officers. Traditionally, the king chooses them, and he also decides when their service is complete.”
I glance at Ikar as disappointment washes over me. I guess hoping that he might retire is off the table. I’ve considered it before, and I can’t quite put my finger on it… but something about his duty runs in his veins, and I don’t think he’d leave it by choice—even for love. It appears less and less likely we could ever be together.
“So the three of you are stuck.” I try not to sound disappointed.
“If that’s the way you’re inclined to see it, then yes. But I see it as a privilege to work with the king as a close friend. He’s one of the best men I’ve ever known.” A sly smile tilts his lips. “I could introduce you, you know. You simply need to ask.”
“No! No. That won’t be necessary. I’m not interested in meeting him,” I say quickly. “That is, in fact, one of my worst nightmares.”
Darvy has just opened his mouth—I assume to ask why—but Ikar must have heard at least part of our conversation because he throws a thunderous look directed at Darvy over his shoulder. Darvy ducks his head with a smile, and I find that the mischievous glint in his eye has me smiling too. It’s in that moment that being in these secluded mountains with these men, knowing that we only have each other to rely on for survival… There’s a comfortable camaraderie between us that I’ve never experienced before on a job—as if we’ve always been friends, even though it’s only been a day. If it could just be me and them, taking jobs like this forever, I might not want to quit. I imagine they could teach me much about navigation and weapons, and I’m sure I would get better at offering lucent…A Black Tulip friends with the high king’s officers?If they knew who I really am, the mark I bear, I can guarantee they wouldn’t see me as a friend. A small voice reminds me I’ve also kissed one of them.
I glance at Ikar and scoff under my breath at how far I’ve fallen, but somehow, alone with them in this dark and very eerie forest, I can’t bring myself to care about the rules I’ve broken. I want to be free, and this job will pave the way… Now I just have to survive, and I know these men are my best bet. If that means I find forbidden friends along the way, so be it.
We continue our trek through the forest, and it’s not long before we begin to see evidence of life long past. An aged axe stuck in a tree, skeletons left of what were once people’s warm homes, and gloam-infested wells that I try not to look too closely on. It appears we pass through the remnants of what was once a thriving village. Several large buildings lean to the side, walls crumbling with roofs fallen in and filled with trees and tall grass. I’m afraid to look for fear I’ll find something, but afraid to look away in case I miss it—the worst sort of feeling.
We walk over mottled pieces of a once-cobbled road as we make our way through the abandoned community. Some of the stones have crumbled to gravel, leaving the path uneven, as if it aims to purposely trip us and requires us to watch our footing closely. But that’s impossible, because none of us are willing to keep from constantly scanning the buildings that line the path.
Shortly after the larger buildings end, there are smaller ones that, based on their size, must have been more homes. Their walls still stand, acting as a shell of what they’d been, now overgrown with vines and brush. Broken, foggy windows,and yawning, dark doorways fill my eyes. They’re blazing creepy, if you ask me.
I find myself sidling up beside Ikar, walking so close I bump his arm with my shoulder every once in a while, but he doesn’t seem to mind. I’d like to think I’m quite courageous—Ididagree to journey through this death forest—but right now I’m feeling anything but courage… more akin to regret in the form of cold sweat and fear-induced nausea. I’m not so proud that I can’t admit my chances at survival aren’t much better with him near. I’d rather be clinging to his bicep and I’m not, so that’s got to count for something in terms of bravery.
Though we appear to be alone, it seems wrong to speak loudly right now—as if doing so might get us killed.
So I lower my voice and ask, “Did you expect this… village to be here?”
He eyes a structure to our left carefully. “The journal mentions it, but we didn’t know the state it would be in.” I don’t like the fact that his voice is just as much a whisper as mine. It means he feels the same.
I think I’d like to study more of this journal to find out what’s in store for us on this joyous journey, but now’s not the time. He’s still focused on a partially collapsed house, and my heart picks up in pace.Did he see something?I warily eye more empty windows. This is the type of place where people die—I’m sure of it. Something creaks and I jump, squeezing the straps of my pack, but I only spot a lean squirrel bound from within an empty house, staring at us for a moment before scampering away.
It’s then that I’m positive I hear a whisper that nips my soul, one that calls my deepest doubts and fears to the surface and forces me to gaze at them with eyelids pried open.
I’m not strong enough for this contract. I’ll fail and kill these men. I’m not capable enough to be part of such a mission.
Chill air bites at the skin of my face, reddening my nose. Whispers grow in volume and my vision blurs in and out. I’m positive I see small black forms in the shape of squat humans, but with only wispy gloam for appendages and oddly blank faces fleeting and skipping around us. I attempt to focus on one, or is it five of them? More?
I should never have taken this job. I’m not good enough. My magic is weak. Nonexistent. Why do I even try? I’ll never be free. Never.
