Page 85 of Meant to Be
“You can’t have that.”
“Nope. Bowls are over there if you want to grab a couple.” He went to the fridge and opened the freezer, pulling out the ice cream. He hoped she liked chocolate loaded with nuts and chocolate bits. When he turned, she was setting the bowls on the counter and pulling spoons from the drawer. She should have looked out of place. She was sophisticated and regal. But as he watched her, she belonged there. Not just in the kitchen, but in a home. His home. The thought terrified him, yet he found it nearly impossible to push away. This is the life they could have had.
“I’ll serve us. Do you want to take the candles into the living room?”
She nodded, picking up her flashlight and the box. She left the kitchen, and he took a moment to regain his composure. He couldn’t let her get to him, but it was hopeless. She was a part of him. She’d always been. But it wasn’t the past that had him compelled to keep her close. This new Sydney was more exciting… more… everything. One part of him told him to get away from her, to drop her off at a hotel to stop the momentum they’d started the night before. But another part of him, a part he thought had died in Iraq, desperately wanted everything being with her promised: love, connection, happiness.
He hadn’t been lying when he told her she deserved more than what he had to offer, but now he wanted to offer her more. She agreed to his conditions, and he wondered what she’d do if he changed the rules. He stood with that thought for a moment, waiting for panic to set in. But it didn’t. Instead, for once, the yearning for what they’d had outweighed his need to protect his heart.
He scooped the ice cream into the bowls and carried them to the living area. Sydney sat near the fireplace, her gaze fixed on the candles she’d lined in a row on the hearth. She’d also lit candles and set them on the coffee table. The light flickered, its reflection shimmering like gold in her honey-blond hair. She turned, smiled at him, and that was it. Any remnants of his resolve to guard his heart melted away and he tumbled, head over heels in love with her again.
Sydney watchedas Mitch brought the bowls of ice cream. The expression on his face mesmerized her. She wanted to believe it was love, but he’d been so clear that love and commitment weren’t in his future. She desperately wished she could change that. Not just because she loved him despite all her attempts to keep her heart in check, but also because he was a man who deserved to be loved. She wanted to soothe away the hurt and grief and guilt. She wanted to help him live life fully. She had to believe it was what his friend Brian would have wanted for him.
He sat with her on the floor, next to the coffee table in front of the fireplace. “There’s lots more, so eat up.”
“So you really had ice cream for dinner growing up?”
“Whenever the power went out. Lexie and I would make forts, and my dad would put on shadow puppet plays with the flashlight.”
Sydney’s heart filled at the image of a young Mitch and Lexie. What a wonderful childhood. Had he really given up the idea that he could have the same as an adult? She scooped up some ice cream and the chocolate cooled her tongue. “I think eating ice cream when the power is out is a good rule. What about the winter? Does the power go out then too?”
“Sometimes, and we’d still eat ice cream and make forts. If it was out for more than a day, we camped out in the living room. My dad would keep a fire going in the fireplace and we roasted marshmallows to make s'mores.”
Did he realize how happy he looked telling the story? She wanted to tell him she wanted to do those things with her kids, their kids, but didn’t want to spoil the moment. She’d agreed to an affair and she’d stick to her agreement.
“Do have any childhood stories?”
She had nice memories, but none like Mitch’s. “When I needed to get away to think as a kid, I went to the Balto statue in Central Park.”
“Balto? The cartoon dog?”
Sydney frowned. “He was a real dog first, who helped deliver medicine in Nome, Alaska. It’s the route of the Iditarod.”
Mitch grinned. “I know what Balto and the Iditarod are.”
“Yeah, from a cartoon.”
“But I know him. What’s the deal with the unicorn cookies?”
She laughed. “I had a patient who had them and her child shared one with me. I was hooked.”
“We should’ve put them on the ice cream.”
“I think everything is just fine as it is.”
He nodded toward the fireplace. “That’s nice.”
“Thank you. I wasn’t sure how you wanted them.”
He gave her an amused look. “Sydney and her rules.”
She felt her cheeks flush with embarrassment, but she tried to look stern when she said, “There’s something to be said for order.”
He set his bowl aside. “When a romantic setting is created, the rule is that it needs to be fully utilized.”
“Really?” Her heart rate kicked into high gear at his sensual tone and the use of the word “romantic.” Did it mean he felt more than friendship and lust?
He took her bowl, setting it on the coffee table. “Uh huh.”
