Page 52 of Shameful Needs
The changes in her were remarkable. A hesitant, calculating look that I now realized had always lurked behind her green eyes disappeared entirely, replaced by genuine eagerness to serve. She stopped flinching when I gave commands, stopped hesitating before obeying. Most telling of all, she stopped faking her responses completely.
“Oh, God, Ryan,” she sobbed on Friday night as I took her against our bedroom wall, her legs wrapped around my waistwhile I drove into her with relentless authority. “I never knew… I never knew it could feel like this.”
Neither had I. The woman writhing in my arms, begging me to use her harder, was nothing like the passive wife who’d lain beneath me in the dark.
So I was surprised when my phone beeped with a text from Mrs. Chen, exactly a week after I had brought Heather home, and my first day back at work.
Heather
In the shower,the first morning Ryan went back to work, I told myself I was doing everything I could to keep my hand from lingering between my thighs and my bottom cheeks when I washed and shaved my pussy, then carefully cleaned my anus.
Yes,I acknowledged to myself,this is difficult. You have to keep yourself nice and clean and bare for your husband, though.
For a little while I thought that admonishment would work. I tried to keep myself from thinking about how Ryan hadn’t had time to fuck me before he left for work. I thought instead about how long and hard he had taken me the day before.
That was, I quickly realized, a mistake. A big mistake.
A flash of heat shot through me as I remembered how he’d bent me over the kitchen counter after lunch, his hands gripping my hips while he claimed my bottom with the roughness he used so often with me these days. The way he’d growled my name, called me his perfect little ass girl while he used me exactly as I craved, but would, it seemed, always be too ashamed to ask for?—
My hips jerked. My fingers had somehow found their way to my clit without my conscious permission.
“No,” I whispered to myself, yanking my hand away. “You’re not allowed.”
But the damage was already done. My body had begun to awaken, responding to the memories with that familiar, helpless arousal that Ryan had learned to control so perfectly. I could feel myself growing wet, my pussy clenching with need as images flooded my mind—his massive cock stretching me, the plug keeping me constantly aware of my submission before and after he took me, the way he’d made me moan “Thank you, sir,” over and over while I came around him.
I tried to focus on washing my hair, on the mundane task of shampooing and conditioning, but my mind kept drifting back to yesterday afternoon. How he’d made me kneel between his legs while he worked on his laptop, my mouth servicing him lazily while he typed emails. The casual way he’d used me while conducting business, as if my eager tongue was simply another vehicle for his pleasure.
My hand drifted south again, almost of its own accord.
This time I didn’t stop it.
Ryan had given me strict guidelines about touching myself—I wasn’t allowed to seek my own pleasure without his permission. My body belonged to him now, to use as he saw fit. But he wasn’t here, and the ache between my thighs was becoming unbearable.
Just a little, I told myself. Just enough to take the edge off.
My fingers found my swollen clit, and I gasped at the contact, then coughed to conceal it. They had an audio feed somewhere in the bathroom—they had caught me before, but that was before I knew they could listen, and tell Ryan what I was doing when he was at work. The hot water cascaded over my naked body as I bit my lip to keep myself quiet, and began to stroke myself with desperate need, my other hand braced against theshower wall for support. I was terrified that the mic, wherever it was, would pick up something that they could forward to Ryan, and he would learn what I was doing.
But God, it felt so good. After a week of having my pleasure completely controlled by my husband, the forbidden nature of touching myself made it even more intense. I could feel my orgasm building with shameful speed, my body responding to the illicit stimulation with desperate hunger.
I closed my eyes and let myself imagine Ryan was here with me, his hands replacing mine, his voice commanding me to come for him. In my fantasy, he pressed me against the shower wall, his massive cock driving into me while the water streamed over our joined bodies.
Please, sir, I thought, so hard to the empty shower that I worried I might accidentally speak.Please let me come for you.
My fingers worked faster against my swollen flesh as I lost myself in the fantasy. In my mind, Ryan’s hands gripped my hips possessively while he took me against the slick shower wall, his voice rough with authority as he commanded my pleasure.
“That’s it, ass girl,” I imagined him growling in my ear. “Show me how much you need your husband’s cock.”
The obscene words I put in his mouth sent electricity through my core, and I felt my climax building to an unstoppable crescendo. My free hand moved to my breast, pinching my nipple the way Ryan had learned I craved, the sharp sensation pushing me closer to the edge. I moved my hand again, down and back, and found my anus with my middle finger. It was all I could do not to cry out at the pleasure that came from the discomfort there itself—the sensation that told me my husband’s enormous erection had claimed me there so often and so rigorously.
I was so close, so desperately close to the release my body had been craving since he’d left for work. My hips buckedagainst my hands as I stroked myself in front and behind with increasing desperation, biting my lip harder to stifle the moans that wanted to escape.
Just as I felt the first spasms of orgasm beginning to crash over me, the shower curtain was yanked aside with a sharp scraping sound.
“Having fun without me, ass girl?”
My eyes flew open to find Ryan standing there, still dressed in his work clothes, his blue eyes dark with a mixture of anger and arousal. In his hand was the paddle—mypaddle, humiliatingly engraved with my name. The one he’d used on me at the facility, the one that had broken down every wall I’d tried to build around my true nature.
My hands froze between my legs and my hind cheeks as terror and shameful excitement crashed through me in equal measure. I’d been caught. After a week of perfect obedience, I’d given in to my desperate need and been discovered in the most humiliating way possible.
