Page 65 of Vistaria Has Fallen
Chapter Eleven
They did not make love that night. The farmer’s visit popped the bubble of isolation. Calli sensed the demands of Nick’s world reaching for him, calling for his attention. She did not intrude on his thoughts. She took care not to give any hint of her need for him, although she badly wanted him to take her in his arms. She needed him to assure her it would all go away, thathe would be hers for just a little longer.
When the moon hung high and small, he picked up her hand and helped her to her feet. “I’m sorry, Calli. This is not what I intended.”
“I’d be a stupid fool to think it could stay away for as long as I wanted.”
“I shared that wish. Let’s see what we can do to preserve what we can, hmm? A night of sleep, that might be free of dreams now I have tastedthe reality, could be enough to push the ghouls away. I will make it up to you tomorrow, I promise.”
Nick held her beneath the green quilt and kissed her cheek, yet his mind was elsewhere. He was preoccupied.
Sometime later Callie woke to a soft growling by her head. She jerked awake, trying to orient herself. She lay on one side, her back up against Nick. He had his arm over her waist.
Thelow growl came again, close by. She stiffened.
“It’s all right,” Nick said by her ear. “She’s nosing around outside. It’s a restless night for everyone.”
“You still can’t sleep?”
“I’ve slept. Sleeping is waste of time when I have you in my arms. I feel I must make the most of the time I have.”
“You’ve been watching me?”
“And thinking, yes.”
She turned all the way over to face him. The moonlightilluminated his face while his eyes were shadowed.
“Black thoughts,” she whispered.
He was silent for a long moment. “Yes,” he said at last, his voice soft.
“Tell me,” she coaxed.
He sighed. “My deepest fear is that Vistaria will be lost. The balance here is so precarious and there are so many wrong turns any one of us could make. That one wrong turn might be all that is needed to destroythe balance.”
“Is that why you worry so much?”
“It’s not worry that distracts me.” He touched her cheek. “If it was simply worry, then I would not have been such a poor host this evening.”
“What is it, then?”
“The weighing of decisions, of actions. All one of them must be considered. I must guess, estimate and measure the possible consequences.”
“I was one of those decisions, wasn’t I?”
Again, he sighed. “Bringing you here was selfish. I gave it no more thought beyond whatIwanted. I did not consider the risks.”
“Tonight, you wonder what the price will be for that indulgence.”
“A little, yes.” His hand came to rest on her waist, heavy and warm. “Only a little, though. I will not regret this and neither should you.”
She could hear the tightness in his voice. Fear? “You don’tsound very convincing, Nick.”
His silence throbbed between them, speaking of the tension within him.
Calli brushed her fingers across his cheek and kissed him. She did not speak of what was on her mind. The wish she hid from him had been growing all evening, shaping itself in her mind. She stored the impression of his hot body against hers. She would need such memories later, when she returnedhome.
“Sleep,” she whispered and kissed his temple.
