Page 29 of Mistletoe Dreams
"No."
The word was so soft he barely heard it.
Obviously, he'd stumbled on something that she didn't want to share and he remembered what she’d told Mason about her own troubled childhood.
"Never mind. You don't have to answer that."
She paused for a moment, with her head down, as though thinking about it.
Then she lifted her eyes to his, and he understood that maybe she understood about the pain that Mason was going through because she had some of her own.
"It's just fresh, that's all. Probably more fresh than it should be, considering that it's been more than a month."
"That's not very long in the grand scheme of things. It took me a lot longer than that to get over my divorce. Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually over it."
"Because you're still in love with your ex?" she asked, and there didn't seem to be any jealousy there, although he wouldn't expect there to be.
He shook his head immediately. "No. She was a mistake I shouldn't have made to begin with. But I would've made the marriage work, because that's what I do. That's the right thing to do. When you make vows and pledge your life to someone, you don't quit just because you realize that the person you chose was not a good choice." He lifted his shoulder. "It's just when you start to build a life with someone and they basically destroy it before they walk out—or maybe their walking out destroys it, I'm not sure—it just... there's pain there where there didn't used to be."
"I see.” She nodded. “It’s kind of the same with me. I made a mistake. It wasn't anything life or death, but it could've been. And I was terminated immediately. I wasn't given a second chance, and I wasn't given an opportunity to make it right. Everything that I had been working for was gone in that instant." She pressed her lips together. "I can understand it. Doctors can't afford to make mistakes. People can die when doctors make mistakes. But it was just hard, that's all."
"I bet."
"But I've come to understand that sometimes when things happen that you wish hadn't, that you weren't expecting, or things that turn your entire life around, like a divorce or something of the sort, God's in it. He really is." She touched the notebook on the table, and her finger slowly traced the spiral rings along theside. "Coming back to Mistletoe Meadows has been so good for me. I hadn't realized how much of myself I had lost in my pursuit of a medical degree and then in my pursuit of medical prestige. I had everything I wanted all laid out, and I'm just not sure that—in fact, I know that it wouldn't have been the best thing for me to do. Not even a little bit. I'm so glad it happened. It still hurts a bit. I'm not saying that it doesn't, but the change was good for me. And God knew it all along."
He nodded. He could see what she was saying. His divorce had been a shock, and like he had said, his entire world had crumbled to the ground, but it absolutely had been good for him.
"I can see what you're saying about me. It's true. I would've stayed with her until I died, but it probably wouldn't have been a good thing. Coming back to Mistletoe Meadows was definitely a nice benefit of that, but I'm not sure that it's been the best thing for Mason. He's struggling." He shoved his hands in his pockets and resisted the urge to pace. "I know eventually it could be the best thing that ever happened to us, but he has to choose to make it that."
"I think he's found something that he's interested in. I definitely think he's found something that he's good at. Whether or not he sticks with it for the rest of his life... I don't want him to feel like he has to. But I think he needed an outlet, and this could be it."
"I've noticed a change in him in the last few days, and you've been instrumental in that, I know. We've been at the river a few times too."
"I've heard you down there running a chainsaw or something."
"Yeah. There's a bunch of firewood to cut up. I figured I'd bring it up and stack it by your door, if you want it. I just hadn't gotten around to offering it." He'd totally forgotten all about it. Every time he saw her, he thought about the connection they had, something he really felt was attraction between them. When he was with her, firewood was the furthest thing from his mind.
"The idea of a fire in the fireplace is really sweet, but I'm probably not going to do that myself. So if you can find someone who could use it, go ahead and give itto them."
He nodded. It was on the tip of his tongue to offer to make her a fire, but that seemed a little intimate and like he was inviting himself into her house.
Plus, he understood what she was saying. A fire was better if it was shared.
"All right. Thanks." It sounded like she had a fireplace, but she just didn't use it. He'd have to keep that in mind.
"Where's Mason tonight?" she asked, looking around and then taking a chair across the table from where he stood.
He followed her lead and sat down.
"He's with my mom. They're decorating the house. He seemed to be kind of excited about it, which surprised me, because typically everything we suggest is shot down."
"I think he's turning around," Hannah said with a smile.
Somehow, her confidence in his son bolstered his spirit in a way nothing had in a long time. He loved that she believed in him. And he supposed Mason loved that too. He'd lost that somehow.
"All right, so let's get started," Hannah began, folding her hands with her notebook in front of her.
For the next two hours, they hammered out something that worked for both security and medical support for the Mistletoe Festival.
