Page 115 of Dark Duet: Platinum Edition
“Liar,” I tease.
Sloan shrugs. “I’m not here to talk about Reed.”
“Don’t you mean…Matthew?”
“Livvie,” she says in warning.
“Janice,” I say sarcastically. “Come on, Sloan. I’ve been telling you both some pretty deep shit. I think I’m entitled to a distraction and some gossip. Reed’s hot. I understand.”
“There’s nothing to tell,” she insists, but she’s getting pink in the face. No matter the age, what I feel is universal. You can’t fight who you’re attracted to. Sometimes fate gets it right, and then makes you pay for it.
“Whatever. I know something’s going on. Caleb used to get upset when I’d use his name in front of other people, but in private? Whole other story. I saw Reed’s face when you called him Matthew. He was giving you the business.”
Sloan chokes on her burger and greedily takes a sip from her drink to clear it. “Livvie!”
“Fine, fine,” I say and pick up my burger, so disappointed. The burger is so greasy, and I can already feel the grease running through my veins. I moan as I chew. “You don’t have to tell me, as long as you bring me another one of these tomorrow.”
“Deal,” Sloan says and takes another bite.
We eat in companionable silence for several minutes, the occasional moan and gluttonous eye-roll as our only means of communication.
Afterward, Sloan and I talk about how I’m feeling.Fine.She asks if I might be ready to talk to my mother.No. Definitely not.
“What could be the harm?” Sloan asks. “She misses you very much.”
I look down into my lap. I’m not sad. I’m embarrassed to look Sloan in the eye and admit the truth. “I want her to suffer.”
Sloan is quiet.
“The last few months have been awful,” I continue. “I’ve been beaten, humiliated, and forced into situations no person should ever have to suffer.” I pause, brooding and getting angry at my mother. “Still, I’d live it all again if I could change the past eighteen years with my mother. I’ve spent so much time already trying to make her love me, understand me. I’ve spent so much time giving a fuck about what she thought. I’m done, Sloan. I’m done caring. It’s time for me to live my own life, my own way, and I don’t want her to be a part of it.”
“What is your way?” Sloan asks. There is no emotional quality to her voice. If she’s judging me, I can’t tell. If she agrees with me, it’s also a mystery.
“I don’t know. I have no idea who I’m supposed to be anymore. I only know I don’t want to be who someone else thinks I should be.”
“Good,” Sloan says.
Sloan and I talk for a while longer before I tell her I’m tired and want to lie down. I let her hug me goodbye, and perhaps…I hold on to her for just a little longer than I intended. Sloan doesn’t seem to mind.
Once she’s gone, I turn down the lights and get in bed with Reed’s recorder. I turn it on and start talking.
***
Another surge of electricity pumped through me. I was starved for release. I screamed behind my gag and struggled against my tethers, but all it did was heighten my suffering. I lifted my ass, trying to find a way to move and create enough friction to send me into orgasm – but it was crushingly useless. I whimpered and let the tears flow when the pulsing stopped. The door opened and a sigh of relief swept through me. Caleb had finally come back to end my suffering. I knew he would.
He approached me slowly and I made soft, pleading sounds to beg him to make it stop. As if reading my mind, his warm hand cupped my face and I inclined toward it, pressing my wet cheek against his wrist and crying pitifully. Had I been able to see, perhaps I would’ve been more embarrassed and prideful. Instead, I was simply lost in my misery and eager to be free of it.
His hand traveled down my neck and chest as another pulse hit me. I arched. I wanted to come. No – Ineededto come. The table shook as I struggled. Caleb’s hand caressed the soft flesh under my breast, which only made it more intense. I only needed a little more, just a little more. It stopped. I cried harder.
I pleaded behind the gag, but Caleb said nothing. Instead, his hands cupped both my breasts and then pulled the clamps off my nipples slowly. Blood rushed to my nipples and I screamed behind the gag. It hurt, but it also made me ache for more. He massaged my breasts and I almost cooed as I tried to press more of myself into his hands. Abruptly, the warmth of his mouth kissed around my left breast, and the soft tickle of his hair caressed my chest.
“Yes,” I sighed.
Caleb’s mouth was achingly gentle; his tongue swirled around my taut flesh – no teeth, no violent sucking, just soft licks and kisses that made me want to touch him. As he repeated the process on the other breast, yet another jolt of electricity assailed my poor clit.
“Please!” I screamed behind the gag. “Please!”
He stood back until the pulsing stopped, and I feared he would leave me again. I heard him unzip his pants and I had to stop myself from nodding fervently.Yes, I want this. Please, I want this.His fingers pulled down the gag, and I immediately began begging him for respite.
